Kaleigh's blog

2011

2011-01-02T12:02:00.003-10:00

I mostly ignored this blog in 2010. Sometimes it was the elephant in the room. Mostly, however, it simply didn't cross my mind. At all. I had a lot on my plate, both because of job searching and then starting a new career, and because of other, very fundamental, changes in my life. And I found myself not writing.

Sometimes I tried to write. I began a few posts, then got completely frustrated or disgusted or bored, and deleted each one. The posts were trite, the posts overshared, the posts were pointless.

For the past few weeks, I've missed it. I've missed writing itself, or participating in the blogging world, or maybe just the navel-gazing that blogging often allowed me to do.

So. It's a new year. For about six seconds, I considered launching a new blog. But that seemed grandiose. A more reasonable thought is just putting up a new post. So, now that I've addressed my long absence, I guess I need to address a few more things. Because of my new career, I'm going to be more circumspect in my posting. Before my new job started, I took down a lot of posts. Since this blog isn't anonymous, I don't have the luxury of posting whatever I think. Because I like being employed, and I like my current job. Also, my kids are old enough that they have a vote, and they prefer to not be the topic of my blog. Or be mentioned at all. And I think that's reasonable.

Which makes the whole thing funny, when you think about it. This blog's address is "anotherworkingmom.blogspot.com", and I won't be writing much about work or my kids. Let's enjoy the irony together for a moment.

Did you hear the crickets chirping? Or was that my imagination?

Okay, I think that actually explains my long hiatus better than the first few paragraphs. Without those two topics - the two topics that were the original inspiration for this blog to begin with - I'm left to write about, well, um. I don't really know. I won't be writing about my cats and dogs, and I don't cook or garden or craft enough to write about that.

I'm going to leave it to the readers, since I don't really have a clue. What should I write about?

Dog spelled backward

2010-02-09T03:24:00.003-10:00

I woke up yesterday morning with an extra person in my bed - my daughter. She's twelve now, and hasn't climbed into my bed in years, so I asked her what was going on. She explained that she had thrown up in her bed a few hours before. (*She also told me that afterward, she slept the rest of the night in her bathtub.)

The night before, we had a strange bit of behavior from "her" dog, Biscuit.

For background, our dogs stay downstairs in our house. We used to have a baby gate on the stairs to keep them from venturing upstairs (because they had occasional accidents up there), but have removed the gate and they stay down.

**For more background, Biscuit, now seven, is a sensitive dog, especially to weather. She gets very nervous when it rains, and generally hides in my closet during storms or even hard rain. Sometimes, however, she sneaks upstairs and hides under my son's bed during bad weather.

So, Sunday night, Biscuit kept going upstairs. Instead of hiding, however, she kept going upstairs, then halfway down the stairs, then back up, then down, and so on. She finally laid down in my daughter's room, still agitated.

My daughter has a day bed with a trundle, and she uses the trundle as an auxiliary night table, piling books, purse, and other items on it.

When I went upstairs to check out the situation, and to tuck in the kids, the girl and I decided that Biscuit was up there to stay, so we removed the books and other items from the trundle so that Biscuit could sleep there.

The dog stayed up there a few minutes, then came downstairs.

A few hours later, my daughter had thrown up all over both beds. As she correctly noted later in the day, if Biscuit hadn't been acting so strange, she would have thrown up on her homework, her school books, her beloved Harry Potter books, her purse, and more.

She concluded that it was a great stroke of luck. I, however, remembered that dog spelled backward is God. And I thanked Biscuit for taking such good care of her girl.

*Yes, in her amazingly rational adolescent, fever-addled brain, my daughter figured that, even with an extra bed upstairs and a perfectly comfortable sofa downstairs, the best place for her to sleep was the bathtub. Because it was near a toilet. She went to the spare bedroom and got pillows and bedding and removed all the shampoo, soap, and other containers from the tub, and made a little bed there. The best I can figure is that she was running a high fever and was completely out of it. Because that's one of the most bizarre things she's ever done.

**We got a surprise snow event later that night, waking up to 3+ inches of snow that were not predicted, but I don't think this was why Biscuit was so agitated.

Not sure what this means

2010-02-02T16:03:00.003-10:00

So, this is what I saw when I was making mashed potatoes tonight.

Doesn't it look familiar?

Where should I start the bids on eBay?

Ten days into '10

2010-01-10T18:26:00.003-10:00

We've made it ten days into the year, and it's probably about time for an update on my non-consuming progress.

I'm delighted to report that I've remembered to bring reusable bags with me every time I've grocery shopped this year. Sure, on freaking January freaking first, the cashier at the store insisted on wrapping my meat in a plastic bag and putting my milk into a plastic bag, which pretty much negated my use of two reusable bags, but every other time it's worked out okay. I didn't know, until today, that Target gives you a five-cent discount for every reusable bag used in your order. I also didn't know, until today, how much a cashier could fit into a reusable bag. Impressive. Well played, Ms. Cashier, well played.

Frustrations? The big one is how few plastic containers are recyclable in our community. Memphis recycling only takes the type 1 and 2 plastics, but most of the products I buy that come in plastic tubs are the type 5, which has much less carbon impact in manufacture, but it darn near kills me to throw away those tubs. Sure, I could reuse them, but there are only so many sour cream cartons a girl needs! We haven't purchased yogurt in quite a while (the kids lost their taste for it), but I may start making my own, and substituting that for sour cream.

I started some sourdough starter a few weeks back, and that's reduced my family's purchases of yeast and sandwich bread. I'm baking every three or so days, and the recipe I'm using slices very well and has a soft crust. I've substituted whole wheat flour for half the white flour in the recipe and it still turns out very well. It's not a San Francisco-type sourdough...more just a solid bread recipe. My starter is pretty basic...a tablespoon (or one package) of yeast, a cup of flour, and a cup of warm water. Mix in a large bowl, cover, and whisk it frequently for a few days, then put it in a smaller container (mayonnaise jar?) and refrigerate. I make sure to use mine at least twice a week, feeding it with equal parts flour and water when I use it. (Basically, if a recipe calls for 1 cup starter, after measuring out the cup of starter, replace it with 1/2 cup each of flour and water. No need to replace the yeast unless the whole thing goes bad or dies.)

My consumer addiction is very easily swayed by television ads, I learned. We already know that I'm hooked on cosmetics, despite the fact I rarely use them. But a major makeup company has brilliantly bundled some eye makeup products by eye color (three shadows, an eyeliner, and a mascara), and I found myself in a bit of consumer lust. (No, I didn't buy them. I'm not insane.)

One concession I made to the kids: the gift cards they received as holiday gifts? They got to "buy" brand-new products with them. The girl and I went shopping today, and she really enjoyed it. However, she seemed to enjoy our trip to Goodwill too. I think the paradigm can shift, even for a tween girl.

All in all? The first ten days of '10 have gone well.

2010

2010-01-02T09:36:00.002-10:00

Yesterday, the first day of my year-long experiment in carbon-footprint-shrinking, we had an early fail.

At the grocery store, I had brought in my reusable bags (yes, I did have to go back to the car to get them, because that's still not a habit), but I still got home with two more plastic bags because the cashier was quite insistent that my meat and milk needed to be in plastic bags so they wouldn't leak onto my other items. And I was tired enough (and polite enough) not to argue.

Yes, we reuse all our plastic bags (when the husband delivers papers, when I walk the dogs, etc.) but I still hated bringing them into the house.

Only one impulse buy at the store, and it was something we do purchase frequently. It was on sale and had coupons displayed alongside, reducing its price to about half what we'd usually pay. If our freezer were less full, I'd have bought more.

The daughter is resigning herself to the no buying new stuff part of the experiment. She was horrified for a moment when she realized she hadn't spend her Christmas gift cards, but I assured her that such purchases were perfect exceptions to the rule, especially because they were technically 2009 purchases.

Too bad it's so cold outside. I'm ready to take down the holiday decorations and put 2009 entirely into the past.

Consumerist addiction

2009-12-30T15:58:00.010-10:00

If I'm going to quit the whole consumer hamster wheel, it makes sense to examine the insane ways my money disappears from my wallet.

Let's examine.

Not too bad. Two filled compacts, one of Mary Kay products, one of Arbonne products. Total at this point: 9 eye shadows, 3 blushes.

Skin care. All Mary Kay. Daytime, nighttime, and exfoliant. I'm not horrified or embarassed yet.

Oops. Here's where we see something a little scary. 14 eyeshadows, 4 blushes, 3 eyeliners, 7 lipsticks/glosses, one foundation, one eyebrow wax. Yikes.

One bronzer, one powder, another foundation, a couple of concealers/highlighters, and another ten or so lipsticks. And a homemade lip balm in a tea container. Hey, at least I'm recycling!

Under the bathroom sink. Lots of products. Hair, body, face, etc.

And more products. 90% of them are lotions. Two hair conditioners, and some fantastic ducks!

Here it is. My shame. 14, yes FOURTEEN hair products. 7 of them are curl enhancers. Are they truly different from each other? Not really.

If I added up the cost of these products, even if I only added up what they're worth now (that they're half gone, 25% gone, etc.), I think I could feed my family for a month or more.

Do these products make me look or feel better? Do I use them

Honestly? No, no, and mostly, no. My hair responds best to a weekly shampoo, every-other-day conditioning, and a little massage oil. My skin prefers the soap I make out of chamomile flowers, sage, rosemary, lavender, and unscented Dove soap. I wear makeup MAYBE once a week (but I wore it daily when I worked outside the home).

Which means I obviously have a bit of a problem when it comes to acquisition of products. Part of my year of non-acquisition will be dedicated to not only not purchasing, but also using what I already have. It's clear that I have no business buying any kind of hair or skincare product for myself for quite a long time

I know I'm not alone here. What's your poison? Where do you spend money that doesn't make any kind of sense? What would make you change that pattern?

New adventures await

2009-12-25T15:20:00.002-10:00

Merry Christmas!

We're celebrating the holiday with my husband's family, and all has gone very well. No drama, no strife. And everyone seems to like their gifts, which makes things even better.

My mother-in-law found a fantastic book for me, and I'm looking forward to embarking on a creative journey. The book's exercises are intended to last a month or a year, and I'm opting for the year option.

I will use this space to share my progress, and I'd love to have some of you join me. It's certainly a good time for me to embrace such a project. Definitely a good time.

Unemployed holidays

2009-12-09T06:30:00.004-10:00

If you'd asked me a year ago, long-term unemployment was definitely not on my list of concerns for 2009. I felt very secure in my job and even was making plans to make myself qualified for further promotions.

And then life happened.

My kids have gotten fairly well adjusted about our family's decreased income, with fewer and fewer requests for new games, dinners out, anything that costs more than a little.

Which brings us to the holidays. Over the past few years, we've tried to reduce, to minimize the whole present thing. Part of it is economic, part of it is philosophical, part of it is just a desire to reduce in general. And part of it is the simple fact that tween kids don't need new toys. Their "play" consists of computer games, football, faceb00k, and video games. And with video games being so easy to rent, we hear fewer and fewer requests to purchase them.

So I have the strangest dilemma on my hands. My kids haven't asked for anything for Christmas, and I don't know what to get them!

Does that mean I don't get them anything?

And yes, I'll freely admit that this post was very much inspired by the book I read yesterday: No Impact Man: The Adventures of a Guilty Liberal Who Attempts to Save the Planet, and the Discoveries He Makes About Himself and Our Way of Life in the Process. It shook me up. A lot. No, I don't expect my family will go off the grid anytime soon, but even if we did a quarter of what his family did, we would be making some major changes.

Hmmmm.

NaBloPoMo is quickly approaching

2009-10-27T03:49:00.003-10:00

November is the original National Blog Posting Month, and I definitely need to get back to writing. I'd already decided to revisit my National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) project from 2007, and I think maybe that daily blogging won't hurt.

So here's the thing. I'm all-in on this garden project right now (see this post if you don't know what I'm talking about). Is this way too boring? Or would it be cool for me to blog the garden?

I'll take requests, too. What do you want to know about me? I can't promise that I'll answer *any* question, but if the question is answerable and appropriate, I'll give it a go. You've got all month to ask, so hit the comments!

Elsewhere

2009-10-27T03:42:00.002-10:00

I'm getting pretty serious about gardening, so I've decided to chronicle my adventures in a new spot. Check it out if you're interested, and please pardon the dust. I haven't spent any time on the blog design just yet, but it'll get pretty in a few days.

This post is not about football

2009-10-26T17:30:00.003-10:00

Yesterday, I attended a different church. It was a planned visit, not one I would have ever considered, but it was about football. See, my son plays on a team that is sponsored by a church (it's a religious rec league) in our neighborhood. And this past Sunday, the team was supposed to come to their service, in jerseys, to be recognized. We are not a family that eschews full participation, so the boy and I headed to a different church.

This church has almost nothing in common with our church. It's a non-denominational Christian church, nearly entirely African-American in membership, and, well, warm. I'm not saying we at Neshoba are cold, but we could definitely take a lesson in warmth from this church. No sooner had we entered the front door than we were greeted, and hugged, by three people (all strangers, by the way). We were early (as instructed by the coaches) so we had a few minutes to get our bearings. In those few minutes, we were given stickers (it was breast cancer awareness Sunday) and I was given a bracelet. And an order of service. And a monthly newsletter. And a newcomer's gift bag, including a reusable water bottle, peppermints, and some literature about the church.

The service? Was definitely not anything I'd ever experienced, but I must say, I truly enjoyed every moment. The congregation is small (I'd say maybe 60 people were there), but the energy level was infectious. The first half hour of the service was praise music, and the five singers (with microphones and backing track) were excellent, and their performances were quite emotionally moving. Although we were sitting in the second row, I turned around a few times and noticed more than a few people (not just women) wiping their eyes and sometimes outright sobbing. (My eyes did tear up more than once....but that happens at good Hallmark commercials, too, so I'm not a good barometer of emotion.)

The service moved on to a congregational reading from Psalms (this was projected from a Powerpoint presentation for those who didn't bring Bibles) and announcements. More music, and offering (which was collected differently from what I'm accustomed to...instead of the ushers passing the plate, congregants came forward with their envelopes). The pastor (whom I've known as one of my son's coaches) then delivered his message, which was fantastic. His primary scripture was the parable of the good Samaritan, which our Director of Religious Education covered beautifully in our story for all ages a few weeks ago, and he brought it to life, verse by verse. Another member of the congregation read the story from the Bible, and he interrupted (this must have been planned) to interpret to more current characterizations. The effect was strong, and the congregation definitely got where he was going. And yes, he might have gotten an "Amen" from me. Or two. Or three.

The prayer was quite moving. There was a full-on alter call, in which he invited those not yet devoted to Christ to dedicate their lives on the spot. But again, he surprised me, by going on to offer the opportunity for those who had found themselves fallen away to come back. I saw two of my son's teammates raise their hands at that point. Then he asked if anyone was in need of prayer. More hands came up. And those who had raised their hands at any point were then invited up front for prayer.

It was particularly touching to see my son's teammates standing together, hands clasped, with one of their coaches (in his uniform, too) with a hand on each shoulder, praying for them. But I was equally moved watching the pastor's face as he listened to each congregant's need for prayer. His compassion was obvious. His prayers were sincere. He prayed for healing, for peace, for wisdom. I saw relief on the faces of the people for whom he prayed.

Do I think he healed them? No, not literally. Do I think that HE thinks he healed them? No, not literally. This didn't seem to be that kind of church. His prayer (which I totally loved) for the sick was that their journey of healing begin at that moment. He didn't pray for healing. He prayed for a journey.

I just realized that I got ahead of the story. Before the sermon, we did something that I normally find very uncomfortable in church services. The hugging. The pastor explained that this church was a family, and we were going to have an "explosion of love" (and yes, that's how it was listed in the order of service). I got hugged about 20 times, mostly by women, but also by teenagers and men and kids. My son got a lot of compliments about his hair (he's rocking the mohawk these days) and lots of those hand-clasp/hugs that boys do these days from his teammates. But instead of feeling awkward or uncomfortable, I felt loved. I really did. I experienced genuine affection and caring from complete strangers.

There were other moments in the service that were great - the boys on the team being recognized, applauded (a standing ovation, actually), and prayed for - the first-time visitors being welcomed - more music. In all, the service lasted about two hours, but the time went quickly (and would have gone more quickly if I hadn't had chili on the stove for the annual chili cook-off in our neighborhood). And after the service, during the traditional refreshments and social time, we were welcomed even more, engaged in conversation, and made to feel like the congregation hoped we would return.

And there it is. I want to return. But I have my own church, a church I love, a church my kids love. It's the only church home they know.

But I also know that I am frustrated going to a suburban church. I live in the inner city. My concerns are much more in the inner city than in the suburbs. But most of the folks in our church are suburban. They don't face inner city problems or issues. And sometimes I have trouble reconciling these two realities.

My thinking right now is that I'll be an occasional visitor to this other church. Maybe on fifth Sundays. Maybe more often...once a month? Is that too much for an officer of the Board in another church? And I still have this issue of theology. I'm NOT a Christian (at least not with a capital C), and this church is very much Christian (maybe even in all-caps). I'm also not black, but I don't think this posed a problem at the church (and in a follow-up conversation with a neighbor who's been a member there for two years, it's quite the opposite...they would love to be more diverse). But the drive is sure a lot shorter. And I did like all the hugs.

Proust Meme

2009-09-29T18:04:00.003-10:00

This meme comes courtesy of Slice of Pink.

1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Knowing that the way I live and the way I want to live are the same.

2. What is your greatest fear?
My children dying before me.

3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
Lack of honesty.

4. What is the trait you most deplore in others?
Hmmmm. Lack of honesty.

5. Which living person do you most admire?
My mom.

6. What is your greatest extravagance?
Clothing.

7. What is your current state of mind?
Pretty positive.

8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
Loyalty. It's rarely deserved.

9. On what occasion do you lie?
When it makes for a better story.

10. What do you most dislike about your appearance?
This changes daily. Sometimes it's a wardrobe issue, sometimes it's the acne scars. Sometimes it's all about lipstick.

11. Which living person do you most despise?
Woah, that's harsh. I'm not answering that.

12. What is the quality you most like in a man?
Strength of character.

13. What is the quality you most like in a woman?
Strength of character.

14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
Like.

15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?
I love my family. I can't pick favorites.

16. When and where were you happiest?
Pregnancy was a great time both times.

17. Which talent would you most like to have?
Perfect pitch.

18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
My employment situation.

19. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
My kids. They're amazing. Such cool people. I sometimes envy them, because they're much better equipped for this world than I am, even now.

20. If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?
A monkey. It looks like fun.

21. Where would you most like to live?
Here. I like it here.

22. What is your most treasured possession?
I don't have one. Really. I love living things (kids, pets, etc.) but don't care too much about non-organics.

23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Directionlessness.

24. What is your favorite occupation?
Anything that involves making people's lives better.

25. What is your most marked characteristic?
Extroversion.

26. What do you most value in your friends?
The ability to be friends with me. I'm not so sure it's all that easy, despite what my husband says.

27. Who are your favorite writers?
Milan Kundera, Charlaine Harris, Nikos Kazanzakis.

28. Who is your hero of fiction?
Jesus Christ in "The Last Temptation of Christ"

29. Which historical figure do you most identify with?
Wow. This is the hardest question in this meme. Joan of Arc is a good choice, although I never would touch her courage. I'll go with Lee Krasner. Look it up if you don't know who she is.

30. Who are your heroes in real life?
My parents, my husband, and Mr. Rogers.

31. What are your favorite names?
Emma, Roland, Darby, Marley, Grace, Eliza, Eudora, Sophie

32. What is it that you most dislike?
Selfishness.

33. What is your greatest regret?
Having only two children. The two we have are fabulous. Who's to say we wouldn't have had an amazing tribe of four if we'd kept on?

34. How would you like to die?
Quickly. Hit by a bus sounds good.

35. What is your motto?
I don't have one, but the verse from Micah leads me a lot: seek justice, love kindness, and walk humbly with your god. That's excellent advice, and if everyone heeded it, our world would be an amazingly just and good place.

Rocks

2009-09-25T03:08:00.004-10:00

I started having nightmares after I lost my job in April. I dreamed about returning to work and having ugly confrontations with various people. I dreamed about being at work but not wearing pants. I dreamed about running into former colleagues and screaming at them. It's safe to say I was a little angry about the situation.

One of my character flaws is that I hold grudges. For a long, long time. The boy in high school who broke my heart? I still think ugly thoughts about him. (Keep in mind that I've been with my husband for 21 years now...married almost 17 years.) The girl who made me miserable in fifth grade? Let's just say that when I heard that she had been checked into a mental institution in college, my first reaction was of delight.

I know it's not nice, and probably not very healthy, but that's part of who I am.

So, the nightmares. I was waking up, sweating, heart pounding, in the middle of almost every night. Sometimes I fell back asleep, but usually not. I spent many anxious pre-dawn hours in the living room, watching "Big Brother After Dark" or reading mysteries or playing spider solitaire.

And then, one Sunday, my friend Laura was the worship associate in church, which meant she led all the liturgy when we had a guest speaker for the sermon. I don't remember exactly what she said in her prayer, but something changed. Immediately, and, so far, permanently.

Like I said, I don't remember her words, but an image came into my mind as she spoke. An image of a stone in the water, being smoothed by the current. I imagined the jagged edges gradually wearing away, leaving a shiny surface. There is a bowl of river rocks in my bathroom, and I thought of those stones, so different from the various rocks I've dug from my garden soil this summer.

And I though of myself as one of those rough rocks, and how I could let the current smooth out my rough edges if I just let it.

A feeling of peace washed over me. Immediately. Deeply. Something had changed. I felt something unfamiliar: forgiveness. I was refreshed, calmed, different.

The nightmares stopped, mostly. I can't say that I've completely forgiven the wrongs I've experienced in my life, but I definitely am not dwelling on them like before. I'm sleeping better. And I look at those two collections of rocks - those rough rocks in the back yard, and the smooth river rocks in my bathroom - and know that that beautiful, shiny, smooth surface came from years of currents wearing away the jagged edges.

So, you think you want to be a football mom

2009-09-24T17:00:00.002-10:00

I know, I know. This is all I write about anymore. Fair enough. But trust me, this is such a paradigm shift in my household, it's worth further discussion.

So, if you're wondering what it means to be a football mom, here's a bit of information that might help you decide if you can take it.

1. Lots of laundry. Memphis has been through a bit of a rainy spell over the past few weeks (we've gotten about 8 inches of rain this month, so far, compared to a normal monthly total of under 4 inches), and rain means mud. Lots of mud. The team's practice pants are white. And practices/games take place four days a week. And the pants have laundry instructions: no bleach.

2. Even if you're as lucky as we are and your son's team practices in the park that you consider your front yard, you will still have to drive across town for games. And by across town, I might mean into the deep depths of the suburbs.

3. There is a lot of down time between the time your son needs to arrive for a game and the actual start time of that game. Bring a book. There's only so much casual conversation you'll be able to make.

4. If your child is the only white child on his team, you'll be sitting with a few people who might be labeled as "ghetto". Embrace it. Or find another team, which will mean much more driving to practices and games.

5. If your child plays in a faith-based league, get ready for lots of praying at practices and games. If you're the faith represented in the league, this shouldn't be difficult. If you're not, definitely have a conversation with your athlete about respecting other people's religious beliefs. And maybe try to teach said athlete the entire prayer from "Talladega Nights" in case he's ever chosen to lead the prayer.

6. Did I mention the laundry?

7. If your kid happens to be one of the biggest kids on the team, one night, he'll come home and tell you how he got to be the "tackling dummy" during practice. You'll need to remember your Lamaze breathing techniques at this point. Fortunately, he'll be in the shower by the time you realize the entire implications of what he just said.

8. Glasses? Not a problem. The helmet has completely protected his glasses. And his face. I only wish he'd had one of these when he was about 18-36 months old, and was the state champion for head wounds.

9. Watching your child make a game-changing tackle? Is just as great as you could imagine. Even if the team loses the game.

10. Hearing the sincerity in the coaches' and players' voices when they tell your child, "Good game"? Is maybe the best thing a parent could hear.

Yeah, I'll admit it. This theater geek? Loves being a football mom.

Posting like a pirate

2009-09-19T06:45:00.001-10:00

The pirate translation of a post a few weeks ago...

Me son started fifth grade at a new sword fightin' academy 'tis month. He knew a couple 'o lads at th' sword fightin' academy, so th' transition was easier than it could have be. He be, however, me sensitive child. While I won't call him shy, I do acknowledge that he takes longer than his extra outgoin' sister to jump into social situations. Which be why I was stunned when, while watchin' th' elementary boys practicin' knife throwin' in th' park across from our ship, he told me he'd like to join that knife throwin' team. But I shouldn't really be surprised. 'tis be th' same jim laddie who decided to take hip-hop dance as his afterschool activity in third grade. So what if he was th' only jim laddie in th' tavern? So what if he was th' only white laddie in th' tavern? He wanted to dance, 'n he did! Perhaps th' knife throwin' be a way to fit in. Perhaps he's simply lookin' fer somethin' physical to do.

Thanks to Post Like A Pirate for the fun.

Another preview

2009-09-18T18:37:00.001-10:00

Our soloist is much better...
And here's a link to the commemorative concert t-shirts.

One of my favorites

2009-09-18T17:51:00.001-10:00

And our arrangement is better than this

2009-09-18T17:45:00.002-10:00

We're at least this good

2009-09-18T17:39:00.002-10:00

But we might sound like this

2009-09-18T17:33:00.001-10:00

Okay, we won't sound like this

2009-09-18T17:20:00.000-10:00

Just call me Taylor Swift

2009-09-18T17:07:00.000-10:00

By popular demand

2009-09-16T05:56:00.003-10:00

Initiation

2009-09-15T03:51:00.007-10:00

I think this makes me a real football mom.

Thank you, OxiClean, for getting his practice uniform clean. No, I wasn't paid to say it.

I suspect I'll get more opportunities to practice my mad laundry skillz, since this is the weather forecast for the week:

Nobody

2009-09-14T19:17:00.001-10:00

puts Baby in a corner.

Rest in peace, Patrick Swayze. Not only did I lose money on you, but I really, really liked you.

Baby's first rap show

2009-09-06T03:32:00.003-10:00

Yesterday was day one of the Memphis Heritage and Music Festival, and we ventured over there twice. Early afternoon, the festival was just getting started, and we watched some Chinese martial artistry, a cooking demonstration, and genuinely enjoyed a DJ mixing some fantastic techno music. But the sun was high, and we were getting warmer than we wanted to be. Since swine flu daughter was still not 100%, we left, but the we planned to return for the headliners playing in the evening.

As the appointed hour approached, the girl was clearly going nowhere. She was tired and not very interested in live music. The boy, however, was still game, so he and I headed out, finding a decent parking space (not as good as our space earlier, but still not bad). We ran into an old friend of mine from college, who also had been one of the boy's preschool teachers, and she was planning to head over to the same stage we were, to see Al Kapone. He and I both like rap music, and the show was fantastic. Great energy, great band.

I will admit, though, that seeing this show with my son was strange. See, when I'm in the audience, I tend to move up to the front of the crowd, and I get a workout, because I like to dance. My boy, however, does not like to get in the front of anything, so we stayed off to the side, still close to the stage, but not as close as I would have liked.

He and I also have different opinions about volume. At a show like this, I am in the "turn it up to eleven" school of thought. But my sweet boy turns the volume down whenever he can.

All this added up to an early departure, before the set was done. The boy claimed tiredness, but I think he was a bit overwhelmed by the noise and the crowd. Turns out he made a very good decision, though, because we saw lightning as we drove home, and a big thunderstorm began a few minutes later. Since we didn't have an umbrella, our parking space would have been horrible if we'd left later.

As it was, we had a great time, and I think Al Kapone has a new lifelong fan. We might have to go back today....

*****I am well aware that I have completely failed at my September NaBloPoMo effort. I'm not being graded, at least not as far as I know, so I'm okay with it. It's hard to blog when swine flu girl totally hogs the computer to play Sims. Just saying.

NaBlo less of a fail

2009-09-03T15:08:00.002-10:00

Seriously, there is almost certainly H1N1 going on at my house. My daughter's teachers kids have it. My son's BFF from preschool's family has it. And I'm pretty darn sure my daughter has it. And my husband. And maybe me.

But September's NaBloPoMo topic is "Beautiful" and there's nothing beautiful about swine flu. So instead, I'll tell you a story.

Tuesday, I was at the post office. I go to the post office a lot, because I'm selling lots of eBay stuff. But there was this guy in line. He was probably about 20 (if you're keeping score, that's about half my age) and completely beautiful. One of the prettiest boys I've seen in a long time.

And then he answered his cell phone. That mini-crush I had going on? Was completely gone.

See, here's the thing. I value manners. Which is why I live in the South. And this beautiful boy? Needed a visit with Emily Post, stat. He discussed his finances, his academic issues, his finances, his rent money, his career dreams, and more, all in line at the post office, surrounded by people. As his conversation progressed, I caught more and more people commenting to each other on the ridiculousness of the conversation. Seriously, once he was gone, people started talking to each other about how annoying he was.

So, as my grandfather would say, "Pretty is as pretty does." Please, please, please, if you must speak on your cell phone in public, keep it short and vague. The rest of us really don't want to know about your rent money or career aspirations. If we did, we would ask.

NaBlo FAIL!

2009-09-03T15:07:00.000-10:00

I blame swine flu.

More postiness coming.

September day 1

2009-09-01T04:21:00.003-10:00

With the option of participating in National Blog Posting Month any month, I've chosen September. The theme is "Beautiful," which should help me keep a positive attitude. It's a little hard to be cheerful when I just spent the better part of an hour writing an article for Examiner.com, only to click a button and delete the whole thing, thereby forcing myself to rewrite the whole darn thing. Hopefully the unintended rewrite was a good thing.

So, what's beautiful? Last night, it was football practice. My son, who has no prior football experience, is one of the bigger boys on the team, and was assigned to be a defense tackle. Despite that nagging maternal fear, what I saw yesterday evening was truly beautiful. My son was double-teamed, and he kept the other guys back. He didn't cede even a yard. Seeing this slender, gentle, quiet boy being physically tough was stunning to me. His goofy grin as he loped across the street from the park to the house was mirrored by my own. He enthused, "That was the best practice ever!" as we hustled him off to the shower and encouraged him to eat his dinner before bedtime.

Watching him grow into this new person is breathtaking.

"We've become normal!"

2009-08-30T12:47:00.002-10:00

It's funny how we all perceive things differently. This afternoon, we attended a picnic for the kick-off of the scouting year. Yes, the boy is joining Cub Scouts. This was not an easy decision, since we're Unitarian Universalists, and the UUs and the BSA have not been on exactly good terms for over a decade. Despite our ideological differences with the organization, however, we have found that a local pack has very sane and open minded leaders, so we're willing to give them a try.

On the way home, the girl was exclaiming about how normal our family has become. With a boy in football and Boy Scouts, a girl in Girl Scouts and piano lessons, a mom who's a writer and a singer, and a dad who teaches college, we certainly seem pretty conventional, at least on paper. I like to think, however, that the whole is greater than the sum of its parts, and I would almost never characterize our family as normal, despite how conventional we may seem.

As diehard urban pioneers, we have certainly chosen an "abnormal" neighborhood for our family. This has created some frustration lately, as many of the girl's friends live in the (in my opinion) far more "conventional" suburbs, and her interests have increasingly become more suburban (the mall being the coveted destination).

Our choice to be a one-car family is further evidence of our deviation from the typical American family. Sometimes having just one motorized vehicle creates stress, or just inconvenience, but most of the time it doesn't really make much difference. At worst, it forces us to be creative. For instance, on Saturday morning, three of us had to be in three different places at almost the same time. The husband had the greatest distance to travel, and he was going to work, so he got the car. The boy had football and had to be at the designated site at 9 a.m. We chose this team because it's so close to the house, so he and I walked there. I had to be at a singing rehearsal at 9:30, and it wasn't terribly far from the house (about 2 miles), so I rode my bike. Everyone got where they had to be at the right time, and we all got home about the same time, too.

I'm definitely willing to say that, at least on the outside, our family is much more conventional than we were when the kids were little and we were cloth-diapering, co-sleeping, extended-breastfeeding attachment parents. We didn't choose homeschooling, which took us out of the more radical fringe of parents of school-aged parents. Our kids are, at least this month, interested in fairly gender- and age-appropriate activities, which definitely exposes us more to the mainstream families.

But we're still pretty far from the mainstream. I've got a pink stripe in my hair that says so.

Reinvention

2009-08-27T03:46:00.003-10:00

My son started fifth grade at a new school this month. He knew a couple of kids at the school, so the transition was easier than it could have been. He is, however, my sensitive child. While I won't call him shy, I do acknowledge that he takes longer than his very outgoing sister to jump into social situations.

Which is why I was stunned when, while watching the elementary boys practicing football in the park across from our house, he told me he'd like to join that football team.

But I shouldn't really be surprised. This is the same boy who decided to take hip-hop dance as his afterschool activity in third grade. So what if he was the only boy in the class? So what if he was the only white kid in the class? He wanted to dance, and he did!

Perhaps the football is a way to fit in. Perhaps he's simply looking for something physical to do.

****************************

I colored my hair a lot this summer. I used temporary pink for streaks. I did highlights. I bleached the whole thing as pale as it would go, then switched to medium brown. (Yes, I know I'm lucky that I still have any hair at this point.) I bought "new to me" clothes at Goodwill, since staying home does not require the same wardrobe choices as did working at the hospital.

I also started choosing books at the library based on nothing but titles that seemed interesting. As a result, I've read everything written by a few novelists (I tend to get obsessive once I find an author I like, especially mystery writers) and learned a lot about herb gardening. I learned that butter and coffee were much more expensive in Memphis during the Civil War than they are now (and that's not even changing the value of dollars throughout the years).

I've settled into a routine of sorts, since the kids started school. I get up early to get them to school, then bring my coffee to the computer and apply for jobs, read my feed reader, then write. With my new job writing at Examiner.com, I try to find out if anything new is going on downtown, or if I need to revise and publish one of my drafts. Once I'm done with that, I do housework, maybe start dinner, depending on what we're having, then read or run errands. We're selling some stuff on eBay, so the post office is a frequent stop, as is the library, and, of course, the grocery store. Then pick up the kids, homework, dinner, and whatever activities are planned for the evening (football, music, etc.)

Maybe one of the things that was missing from my former job was a routine. Every day was an exercise in crisis management - who had called out sick? who was in the weeds? where was the drama? what food would not be at the correct temperature when it was time to serve it? - and I function much better with a routine. Having learned that about myself, I can make better decisions about which jobs to take, or even which promotions to decline.

Wow. Just wow.

2009-07-10T15:19:00.000-10:00

I have no words. It's not a joke.

Vehicular

2009-07-07T03:16:00.004-10:00

I want one of these MADSEN Cargo Bikes a lot.

We're looking at replacing our well-loved and well-worn minivan soon, and the replacement vehicle will be smaller and more efficient. I was thinking about the new car yesterday, when Craig and I were running errands in the minivan. A Smartcar drove by, and I was a little envious, because it would have been just right for what we were doing (returning library books, picking up a bag of sand and a few plants). A few minutes later, a person on a Vespa also caught my eye, because other than the sand, all our items would have fit in a scooter's cargo area, too.

But the cargo bike? Genius. Especially for those of us who love to bike to the farmers' market but then buy too much and have smushed produce from overpacking the backpack.

So click that there link up top and let's all try to win me a bike, okay?

Doggone weeds!

2009-06-30T03:52:00.002-10:00

That adorable dog you see above this post came to us with a hidden talent. I don't know if he was trained to do this or not, but he's an uncanny gardener's assistant. I awoke early today and discovered that it was cooler than usual, so I decided to spend some quality time outside, first watering and weeding in our Uptown Community Garden (and only was divebombed twice by the aggressive birds), then weeding my fallow garden.

Despite every dog training authority's advice, I let our dachshund, Klaus, join me in the garden. He's an energetic guy, and he loves to be in the sunshine. I'd also seen his gardening streak once or twice before, so I thought he might be helpful.

Understatement of the year. We had an old cabbage plant that was well past its prime, so I was breaking it down and deciding whether to remove the roots or let it regrow. Klaus found the thick stem I was working on and set about destroying it, systematically, then chewing up the six-inch stem and spitting it out. Compost, anyone?

He's most effective, however, in clearing sections of the garden. If I start pulling out grass or clover, he essentially pushes me out of the way and gets to work. He digs and digs, and, as he finds roots or vines, pulls those with his teeth. It's really remarkable to watch, because he's very focused on the task and does not generalize it to digging the entire yard.

Poor guy, though, he got plenty of dust in his nose, and now he's sitting next to me, sneezing. And falling asleep. Gardening is hard work, after all.

From under my rock

2009-04-22T16:47:00.003-10:00

Absentee blogger here. I feel like a deadbeat dad, except I do take care of my kids and I'm female.

Despite my long absence from the world of blogging, I'll skip the update part, because there isn't much to tell. I went to work, I came home, I hung out with the family, I slept, lather, rinse, repeat. Nothing greatly amazing or exciting or even amusing has happened since I last regaled the internet with meme after meme after meme.

Small things that did happen:

My mom joined Facebook.
So did my kids.
My daughter got a cool haircut.
We changed the dog's name to just Klaus.
I gave one of my employees a nickname.
None of my favorite patients died.
One of them grew hair and I didn't recognize her at first, which was funny.
I got to give a kid a bike and have pictures taken.
Our neighborhood started a community garden.
Rock Band: World Tour is the most fun game I've ever played.
My Wii Fit age is several years younger than my actual age.
I cut the grass with a lawnmower for the first time.
I coordinated the remodeling of my parents' new house.
I lost a few pounds.

And that's what's happened here.

There were a few other things, but they don't really bear discussion, or I'm not ready to discuss them, or whatever. We'll leave it at this: I had a rough patch and it's better now. The first quarter of 2009 kicked my ass. But I'm planning to kick the rest of 2009's ass even harder. Because that's how I roll.

So, I'm back. At least for tonight.

Isn't this the meme blog?

2008-12-31T07:33:00.002-10:00

YOU CAN ONLY ANSWER EACH QUESTION WITH ONE WORD. GOOD LUCK!

1. Where is your cell phone? Desk

2. Your significant other? Home

3. Your hair? Straightened

4. Your mother? Entertained

5. Your father? Thorough

6. Your favorite thing? Snuggling

7. Your dream last night? Forgotten

8. Your favorite drink? Coffee

9. Your dream/goal? Retired

10. The room you're in? Office

11. Your fear? Torture

12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Director

13. Where were you last night? Home

14. What you're not? Father

15. Muffins? Yum

16. One of your wish list items? Coffeemaker

17. Where you grew up? Places

18. The last thing you did? Financials

19. What are you wearing? Clothes

20. Your favorite TV show? House

21. Your pet? Busy

23. Your life? Hilarious

24. Your mood? Fine

25. Missing someone? Meh.

26. Your car/truck? Driveway

27. Something you're not wearing? Earrings

28. Favorite Store? Target

29. Your summer? Hot

30. Your favorite color? Brown

31. When is the last time you laughed? Today

32. Last time you cried? Recently

THREE PLACES I GO OVER AND OVER: Church, Work, Grocery

THREE OF MY FAVORITE FOODS: Pork, Sushi, Breakfast

PLACE I WOULD RATHER BE RIGHT NOW: Vegas

Another one....

2008-12-30T05:28:00.006-10:00

The annual Sundry End-Of-The-Year Questionnaire.

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before? Saw someone turn 100 (my grandma).

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? Sort of, for both.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? A friend from church and my next door neighbor (definitely geographically close, right?)

4. Did anyone close to you die? No.

5. What countries did you visit? None, unless you count Mississippi and Alabama (both of which, by the way, are lovely, and full of wonderful, friendly people).

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008? A bigger savings account.

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? the day after Memorial Day (the new Starbucks opening), September 11 (the day of my surprise promotion), Election Day, the day after election day (when the dog got sick), Thanksgiving (the day he died...but also the day that my parents ate Thanksgiving dinner at my house and proclaimed it good).

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? It was a good year for me professionally. The surprise promotion was just confirmation that I'd been doing things well for some time, and that people noticed. So it wasn't necessarily a 2008 achievement (I think I'd been good at my prior position for quite some time), but it finally got noticed and the noticing got acted upon in 2008.

9. What was your biggest failure? Dropping other balls. I got so wrapped up in work that I let a lot of other things slide more than I like to. I've gotten more isolated than I like to be, mainly because I'm tired at the end of a workday, and I've gotten very possessive of my free time. I need to work on this.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury? Nothing beyond a mystery bruise and a cold. Good year for the body.

11. What was the best thing you bought? Takeout pizza on a night I really needed downtime. And a fantastic, and very cheap, pair of shoes that live at my desk at work.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration? This week, my dog's. She's six, and has always seemed like an overgrown puppy. I determined that "better late than never" was the best approach to her behavior and got more serious about being a good pack leader, and it's working. That makes me very happy, but a little ashamed that I didn't try harder oh, say, about five years ago. It would have saved my shoulder, that's for sure.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? Our president.

14. Where did most of your money go? Groceries, bills, mortgage. Not necessarily in that order.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? Coffee. I'm better now.

16. What song will always remind you of 2008? that one about kissing a girl

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

a) happier or sadder? happier

b) thinner or fatter? thinner

c) richer or poorer? About the same.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of? Volunteering.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of? Watching bad television.

20. How did you spend Christmas? The day itself? In the car, speeding home from Florida.

21. Did you fall in love in 2008? Not with any humans.

22. What was your favorite TV program? True Blood, probably.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? I honestly avoid hating as much as I can. It's never done me any good, and it consumes a lot of energy. That being said, I've lost some respect for a few people.

24. What was the best book you read? This is driving me crazy. I remember reading it. I remember telling everyone about it. I can't remember it, and searching my bookshelves isn't helping. A strong second place goes to "The South," by the same authors as "Big Muddy" (I'm too lazy to look), which I've been reading very, very slowly. It's remarkably informative and entertaining, and has given me a better way to explain why I live here by choice and will never willingly leave. I'm sure every region is compelling, too, in its way, but I'm a Southerner by birth and choice (not by upbringing and culture), and I love it here.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery? Watching my family play Rock Band on the Playstation. I love how my son looks like a rock star on guitar but sounds like a little boy when he sings.

26. What did you want and get? A decent raise.

27. What did you want and not get? A new car. One day we will. But I think we'll keep driving the old minivan until it's just no longer possible. And the coffee maker of my dreams (only because I haven't found one in my price range that does everything I want).

28. What was your favorite film of this year? This survey is starting to feel very familiar. Once was definitely the best thing I saw this year.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? An ancient 37. We went strawberry picking the weekend before my birthday, and I was in training at work on my real birthday.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? If that whole stock market thing hadn't happened. I could have done nicely without those panic attacks in October. I'm better now, but it was pretty creepy there, obsessively checking my retirement money. (I don't check anymore.)

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008? Until October, I'd call it Starbucks dress code. Afterward, vaguely hip professional. My husband might disagree.

32. What kept you sane? My family. And my commute (ten minutes, door to door, on foot). I like walking.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Britney Spears. I'm glad she's doing better. I hate to see anyone in as much pain as she was obviously in.

34. What political issue stirred you the most? That war.

35. Who did you miss? My two bestest BFFs who live way too far away.

36. Who was the best new person you met? A parent at the hospital who taught me a lot about grace and graciousness and gratitude and being generally cool, smiley, and well-groomed, even when going though a parent's second-worst nightmare. And looked smokin' hot the entire time. She's my hero. (And her kid is doing just fine...which is why it was the second-worst, not the worst, nightmare for a parent.)

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008. Sometimes people notice when you're doing a good job and they actually reward it. Or, as Cartman would say, "Follow your dreams, you will succeed. I'm living proof." BEEF-CAAAAAAAKE!

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

And she was looking at herself

And things were looking like a movie

She had a pleasant elevation

She's moving out in all directions.

The world was moving, she was right there with it (and she was).

The world was moving, she was floating above it (and she was).

2008 meme

2008-12-28T12:18:00.003-10:00

via Kalisah

1. Was 2008 good for you? Yes, it was. It's been a pretty good year.

2. What was your favorite moment of the year? Honestly, it's hard to choose one. We started out well, with a promotion (it became official in January), followed by another in September, but election night was pretty great. I'll count that.

3. What was your worst moment of the year? That's easier to choose. That would be when my sweet dog died in my arms on Thanksgiving night. It was just as awful as you might imagine.

4. Where were you when 2008 began? In my house, as usual.

5. Who were you with? My husband and maybe the kids. I can't remember if they were still up.

6. Where will you be when 2008 ends? See #5. I'm a creature of habit. We'll eat at Sekisui beforehand.

7. Did you keep your new years resolution of 2008? Maybe?

8. Do you have a new years resolution for 2009? Still thinking about it.

9. Did you fall in love in 2008? With a dog, yes.

10. If yes, with who? His full name is Baron Klaus von Waffles, but I usually call him Waffle Hut.

11. Are you still in love? Snuggling now :-)

12. Did you breakup with anyone in 2008? Cracker Barrel restaurants in general, which equally dismays and amuses my parents.

13. Did you make any new friends in 2008? Yes. Well, "friends" is probably too strong a word. I've gotten friendlier with people at the Corporation, mainly because my first promotion was to a pretty visible position, and I dealt with a lot of people in that position.

14. Who are your favorite new friends? Do I really have to play favorites?

15. What was your favorite month of 2008? I liked September a lot.

16. Why this month? The unexpected promotion.

17. Did you travel outside of the US (or your home country) in 2008? Nope.

18. How many different places did you travel to in 2008? A few...mostly to visit family. Most recently to Florida with my parents. I highly recommend visiting Sea World on Christmas Eve.

19. Did you miss anybody in the past year? Jennifer and Kaki.

20. What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2008? Once. If you haven't seen it, you should. It's fantastic.

21. What was your favorite song from 2008?   Okay, this will probably make you lose all respect for me, but that Kid Rock song this summer? I loved it!

22. How many concerts or plays did you see in 2008? Two, I think. Maybe three.

23. Did you have a favorite concert in 2008? I don't think so. Nothing stands out.

24. What was your favorite book in 2008? I jumped on the "Twilight" bandwagon and really liked it, but I'm now reading the Sookie Stackhouse books and I like them better.

25. How many people did you sleep with in 2008? Just the one.

26. Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year? Not that I can think of.

27. What was the biggest lie you told in 2008? Can't think of one. Not that I'd tell you anyway.

28. Did you treat somebody badly in 2008? Not on purpose. I can't think of anyone.

29. Did somebody treat you badly in 2008? Not really. I have a pretty good life.

30. What was your proudest moment of 2008? That would be the second promotion. It was very unexpected and communicated the confidence that several people have in me as a professional. It felt great.

31. What was your most embarrassing moment of 2008? I'm sure it involved my dog somehow (not the dead one or the new one...the naughty one!)

32. If you could go back to any moment of 2008 and change something, what would it be? I would have declined some of the tests the vet ran a few weeks before the dog died. That was an expensive vet bill.

33. Where did you work in 2008? Same place I've worked since 2004. Best employer ever.

34. Favorite TV shows(s) of 2008? House, Lost, Heroes, Celebrity Rehab.

35. Favorite Band(s) of 2008? I don't know. I'm pretty out of touch.

36. Favorite Food in 2008? I wish I could honestly answer "Fruit" but that would be the biggest lie I told this year. I can honestly say that I've been known to dream about the General Tso's Chicken at the Corporation's Cafeteria.

37. Favorite Drink in 2008? Franzia Chianti. In a box.

38. Favorite Place in 2008?  My bedroom.

39. Favorite person(s) to be with in 2008? My family.

40. Favorite person(s) to talk to in 2008? Again, back to Kaki and Jennifer. Although I have to give my dad some props. He's never been much of a talking on the phone kind of guy, but we've had some VERY good conversations this year. I don't know what's making him so chatty, but I'm enjoying it.

41. Favorite trip in 2008? Orlando last week. The first full week I've taken off work for a long time, and it's been great.

42. Favorite stores in 2008? Huh? I do like Fresh Market.

43. Hardest thing you had to go through in 2008? That would be the dog situation. I haven't written a blog post about it (well, that's not quite true...it's in my drafts folder, but I don't know if I'll ever post it. It's not for the squeamish.) In a nutshell, he got quite ill the day after the election, got somewhat better with medication for a few weeks, then got very sick again on Thanksgiving night and died about half an hour after I realized that he was having symptoms. We wouldn't have had time to get him to the vet even if we'd left the house immediately, and I held him as he died. It was not fun at all. And it took a long time to process (um, I'm still processing it.)

44. Most exciting moment(s) in 2008? The presidential election.

45. Funniest moment(s) in 2008? Watching my kids playing "Rock Band".

A late Christmas Gift

2008-12-26T05:54:00.001-10:00

For anyone who thinks opera is not accessible for "regular" people, I offer this rebuttal. Chills at 4:09.

You're welcome, and happy holidays!

Mabye if I do more of these I'll actually post something

2008-12-11T04:53:00.003-10:00

Today I: have a sore throat but am choosing to ignore it.

Tomorrow I will: get on an airplane and see my family to celebrate my Grandma's 100th birthday. She's old.

I'm looking forward to: sleeping late tomorrow morning.

I could pass on: getting on an airplane. I really don't like to fly.

Newest song I like: I heard something on Saturday Night Live this past week that I liked. But I don't remember what it was called. That's my husband's job. Maybe he can make me a mix tape of the last 20 songs I've liked but didn't know what they were.

Last show I saw: TV show? Or live band? Top Chef, if it's the former, and Neighborhood Texture Jam, if it's the latter. I still have a few bruises from the mosh pit (!!) and it took a day for my hearing to recover, but it was so worth it to go back 20 years in time to when I had a mohawk and met my husband across the crowded room at an NTJ show. Good times. I love a good mosh pit, especially when it's populated by people aged 35-45. Much more considerate than those crazy kids back in the day.

Something aggravating: getting sick right before going out of town.

One thing you may not know about me: if I told you you'd know. But I'll share something easy - we got a new dog on Sunday and I'm completely in love. Mr. Waffles is his nickname. His real name is Baron Klaus Nomi Von Waffles. Because he's a dachshund and should have a name as long as his torso.

I can still: throw down in a mosh pit!

Gift I'd want if money was no object: a new car.

My Memphis (not my video, but yes, my neighbor)

2008-12-01T16:23:00.000-10:00

NaBloPoMo

2008-11-04T17:37:00.004-10:00

Yeah. I didn't even try this year.

At this point, I'm trying to decide whether to keep this blog around or just save all the entries to my hard drive and be done with it. I still compose the occasional post in my head (and even have a few saved as drafts) but I really don't have much to say.

Nor have I much time to say it.

So, please accept my sincere Thanksgiving greetings. I hope you have a wonderful holiday, and maybe I'll be back in December. Or 2009. Or something.

Vote

2008-11-04T04:56:00.002-10:00

I'm posting, not because I have anything great to say, but because I want you to visit the shared sites on my sidebar. They're all telling you pretty much the same thing, but their combined voices raise a fantastic noise.

Vote!

It's October!

2008-10-02T06:28:00.002-10:00

And you know what that means, right?

31 days of pink!

I missed yesterday, but here's your daily dose.

Details

2008-09-11T16:30:00.002-10:00

So, the promotion.

Without divulging too many details, I'll tell you the basic story. Our department has had a manager position vacant for several months. That manager was my boss, whom I still miss a lot.

I had not even considered posting for that position, for several reasons. I love my current job - really - and I didn't really want to change. Also, having only been in my job for 9 months, I didn't think I was fully qualified for the position. Add a few other reasons, and you've pretty much got my mindset.

But our department's director, as well as her bosses, one of my most trusted colleagues (I call her my work BFF), and another manager in our department had different ideas, apparently. Ideas they discussed yesterday, while I was off, chilling on the couch. I'm watching episodes of "What Not To Wear," and they're having what shall heretofore be called "the Kaleigh meeting."

And this morning, when I was incredibly busy (doing my current, about to be former, job), the director wanted me to come into a meeting STAT. And I couldn't. For an hour. Because I was so busy (and even if I'd know what was coming, I still would have put her off...there were only two of us there, and thirsty people wanted coffee!). Maybe I should have figured out that her constant coming back to my area to see if I was ready yet, all with a big grin on her face, meant something important.

I finally was able to walk away, and she chased me down, cornered me, and offered me the position.

In a moment of great poise, calm, and professionalism, I squealed like a nine-year-old girl. And maybe I jumped up and down in my chair a little.

Details are still being worked out on the HR side, but I'm already assuming some new duties, most of which include sitting in lots of meetings.

The best part? After nine months of working in a position with a corporate-decreed dress code, I'm totally going to have to go clothes shopping!

Promoted!

2008-09-11T07:14:00.001-10:00

More later, but I just got a big promotion at work! And I wasn't expecting it! At all! Totally took me by surprise, in fact! Holy cow! Exclamation point!

Busy

2008-09-07T15:13:00.002-10:00

To say that last week was interesting would be the understatement of the year.

Oh, and my husband is in love with Sarah Palin.

Memphis, Saturday, August 16

2008-08-23T05:34:00.001-10:00

On the thirty-first anniversary of Elvis Presley's death, I took some pictures of the Memphis I love. Please to enjoy!

Absurd

2008-08-21T13:20:00.002-10:00

Bullet points to illustrate why being a mom is so much fun:

When discussing my daughter's reading choices, I pretended to throw up in her mouth.
On the way home from the grocery store, said daughter and I fantasized about awesome pet names. Since our current dogs are named Biscuit and Gravy, we decided their successors should be named Mr. Waffles and Beignet. But the true winner of awesome dog names is what she (at age 6) originally intended to name Biscuit: PUPCAKE! (The name was vetoed by my very heterosexual husband.)
Being on instant message with the same daughter, discussing how the satellite wasn't working because it's raining. A transcript follows....

She: the satellite is out
me: Is raining
She: yes
is
me: right
sometimes the satellite doesn't likey the rain
She: ha ha
me: so yeah, that
She: Why are we chatting on gmail when we are in the same house?
me: good question
She: WE ARE LAZY BUMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
crap i dont wanna be a lazy bum
me: then come downstairs, silly
I'm a wet lazy bum
She: ha ha did u just walk the dogs?

So apparently, we're lazy, I'm wet, and that's funny.

My plans, let me share them with you

2008-08-15T04:03:00.004-10:00

After a few busy weekends, the family calendar has very little ink this weekend. Which is a good thing - I don't strive to fill up every extra moment. The kids started school on Monday, and that's cut into their down time (as well as totally destroying their preferred sleep schedule, which resembles the sleep patterns of teens more and more). Seeing as I'm the self-appointed creator of the pajama day, down time is something I encourage.

But not this weekend. At least not tomorrow.

My feed reader brings me news of local events, and this one I'm not missing. Mainly because it can be done as a family, and it can be done however we choose.

As a lover of Memphis, this is an opportunity to create a visual love letter to my chosen hometown. It's also an opportunity to encourage the kids to look at their city with a different eye. To examine what they see.

I'll share pictures once we've got them. We can't start until 12:01. I'm making a list of what I want to photograph. Keep your fingers crossed that we see a bunch of Elvis impersonators.

Opening Ceremonies, or the moment I know I'm raising my children right

2008-08-09T01:10:00.004-10:00

I'm a dork. I admit it. Every four years (well, now every two), I anticipate the opening ceremonies of the Olympics. I watch, I get teary-eyed, it's great.

Nobody in my family shares my enthusiasm (even the dogs look at me crazy), but at least Craig is tolerant (especially because he can watch a DVD on the laptop).

The ceremony last night was conveniently timed to begin right before we had dinner (taco salads, in true international spirit), so I paused the program (thank you, TIVO!) and made the kids watch with me. They were interested, sort of, for the first few minutes. At least anytime there were flashing lights or explosions.

My darling daughter, the model of refinement and elegance, made a cultural observation:

"If Memphis hosted the Olympics, we'd ghetto it up real good!"

And her brother, with impeccable timing and wit, added:

"It would be the Ghett-Olympics!"

Here we go

2008-07-28T16:29:00.002-10:00

Although my blog entries rarely focus on my religious beliefs and practice, I like to think that those beliefs and practice inform many of my entries, as they inform most of my life.

And yesterday, people like me, members of a smallish Unitarian Universalist church in Tennessee, people who value the children in their congregation, people who welcome people into their church family, regardless of sexual orientation or race or religious heritage, came under attack. If you click any of the links in my "Shared Items" sidebar, you'll get the story. You've probably already heard about it on television or any other news source.

I'm very, very angry, folks. Angrier than I remember being for a long, long time. The perpetrator of this violence - I'm having trouble calling him a man, or even a human - has hit an amazing low of cowardly, disgusting behavior. Sneaking a shotgun and an ass-ton of ammunition (in a guitar case) into a church, a peace-loving church, in which the children of the congregation were leading the service, then opening fire on the congregation, wounding many and killing, at this time, two folks who were more than qualified for AARP membership, is pretty much the apex of asshattery.

And this tree-hugging, gay-affirming, race-justice-seeking liberal woman is pissed.

I'm angry to learn that some of my brothers and sisters in faith are now afraid that they won't be safe at church.

I'm angry to think that my children may learn about this story and be afraid to go to church.

I'm angry. Just angry.

And maybe, just maybe, there's a part of my anger that was well-illustrated by one of my co-workers' comments today. "How often do liberal people go into fundamentalist churches and open fire?"

Um, none.

That's not how we roll.

My people were attacked yesterday, in a hateful, hate-filled, hate crime. My people were persecuted yesterday. My people were afraid and injured and murdered and brave. Two gentle, angry men wrestled the gun away from the murderer. One gentle, angry man gave his life to save other members of the church he served.

And gentle, angry people are lighting candles all over our nation for these people.

Please join us.

Boys will be boys?

2008-07-13T05:43:00.005-10:00

Yesterday evening, I had dinner with my group of au pairs. We meet once a month - an opportunity for me to make sure they're all okay, and an opportunity for them to all be in the same place at the same time - and they usually go out afterward as a group.

These young women have a unique perspective about children, since they are full-time (for the most part) caregivers for children ranging in age from toddler to teenager. They entered the program with more childcare experience than many first-time parents have had. Individual au pairs have different motivations for joining the program (lack of jobs in their home country, a desire to improve their English, a desire to study in America, or, yes, the desire to marry an American), but they definitely all learn at least one thing while they're here: kids are a lot of work. Sort of like the show "The Baby Borrowers" but in a much more real-world setting.

When we get together, we talk about their lives - how they're getting along with host families, if they're experiencing homesickness, how school is going - but they often move the conversation to my life. Most of my au pairs have met my family at least once or twice (the kids have joined me for more than one monthly meeting), and they ask about the kids. I try to share one or two interesting stories and leave it at that.

Yesterday, my son became the topic of conversation quite unintentionally. We'd been talking about kids' movies, and one woman mentioned "Prince Caspian," which she'd loved (I did too). I told her about Alex's response to the movie, and the whole group was really intrigued.

See, Alex isn't one of those boys who loves violent movies and games. He's a gentle kid. His taste in video games is dominated by games that emphasize interpersonal relationships, especially the Sims games. He hasn't shown much interest in fighting games, and when he plays with friends, he's not the kid who instigates games based around violence.

And when we saw "Prince Caspian," he was weary of the battle scenes long before the movie was over. I remember sitting next to him and seeing him begin to squirm and look uncomfortable with what was going on onscreen.

Weeks later, just to drive the point home, all four of us saw the new American Girl movie about my daughter's favorite fictional character, Kit Kittredge. The movie was smart, interesting, and didn't include violence (although it definitely did include difficult subject matter, based as it was in the Great Depression). We knew Susie would love it, but we were pleased to hear Alex's review: "It was the best movie I've ever seen!"

He starts his week at summer camp today. It's his third year at this camp, and he thrives there, with the guitar and campfires and cooperative play. It's a gentle place, and it's good for his gentle spirit.

Since we've been in our house for three years now, I've started to get a little restless with some of the design choices we made. The children's bedrooms are the most recent focus of my dissatisfaction. We helped Susie's room grow up a little bit by swapping out her old, white furniture with the furniture we've been using in our bedroom (which was in my grandmother's bedroom since the middle of the last century). Making those changes for her, however, just pushed the point home that Alex's room was in need of even more drastic changes.

I consulted with him to see what he wanted for his room. When we originally moved into the house, he was really fascinated by maps, so we had chosen fabrics that emphasized geography.

This time, he wants a Hollywood theme. We have some decorations that we use for our annual Oscar party; those will work well in his room. And I have ideas for the window treatments that will emulate the curtains around a movie screen.

This weekend, Craig and I took a spin through a few different stores, looking for items that might work in Alex's room. A quick glance through the aisles of children's furnishings at Target showed us that the world of retail still thinks there are only a few things that boys need: sports, cowboys, and camoflauge. (And the "girl" side of the aisle was no better, with its emphasis on pink and flowers - none of which I eschew, but it seems awfully limiting.)

I had the same frustration when I was buying clothes for my children when they were little. Boys' clothes had the same motifs as the bedding: bugs and sports. Items for girls were decidedly pretty, with precious florals or ladybugs, and predominately pink. (And those were the ones without Disney or other characters.)

Raising a child who doesn't quite fit within the culturally-dictated norms is interesting. It takes creativity. And I wouldn't trade it for anything.

edited to add: I found the most fantastic curtains at IKEA a few weeks later...they're red velvet! I bought four panels, two of which I'll turn into valances, thus leaving two panels to curtain his windows, and the valances to bridge the wallspace between, thereby creating a "movie screen" between the two windows. He was THRILLED when he saw them. Now I just need to get to sewing and finding adequate curtain rods.

The experiment will continue

2008-07-06T07:13:00.002-10:00

But not this week.

We've begun our three-week stint of kid-free life. Since Craig is working (indefinitely) at the Corporation, neither of us has a need to drive to work. With two fewer mouths to feed, we have fewer grocery needs.

This week, however, I have a few meetings in the suburbs, both of which entail 40 or so miles of driving, round trip. While I'd like to say we're pledging to limit our driving to under 100 miles this week, I'm not sure we're going to make that commitment this week.

I've discovered, however, that when gas prices have reached the nearly-$4-per-gallon mark, that my mindset about driving changed. Keep in mind, this is coming from a person who lives two blocks from work and generally only drives a couple of times a week. So I'm already far less dependent on gasoline than many, many people. But still, something changed.

See, before, when gas was a mere $2.50, or even $3 per gallon, I still was more than willing to drive across town, then come back home, then go out again, possibly in the same direction of where I had been before. Lately, though, I've put more thought into our car use, trying to consolidate trips so that one trip led to four or five errands being run at the same time.

Even yesterday, on our way back to Memphis from Nashville (where we dropped off the kids with my parents), we stopped at the Costco that is just off the interstate. We needed dog food (well, I guess the dogs needed the dog food, more accurately), and we went ahead and bought some other groceries, hoping to save a trip later in the week. A few months ago, we would've gone ahead home, then headed out to Costco later in the day, or the next day.

So I guess the goal is to see if we can make our current tank of gas (about 3/4 full) last for three weeks. I suppose it doesn't really matter how much we drive in the first week versus the second or third week. We're just going to drive only when we need to drive, and we'll not drive when we don't need to.

Which is why I'm not riding my bicycle to the dentist on Tuesday, and I'm not feeling bad about it.

The BlogHer Blues

2008-07-03T03:58:00.003-10:00

As the sporadic nature of my posting might suggest, I've been mostly absent in the blogging community lately. Work's been busy, life's been busy, and it seems like I've lost my flair for snark. I don't remember the last time I participated in an open thread at MamaPopTalk, and I've been guilty of opening my feed reader, seeing a three-digit number in the unread posts, and marking all read.

I attended BlogHer last year, when it was held in Chicago, mainly because Chicago is an attainable trip for me. My brother and his wife live there, it's an easy train ride away, and it fit very nicely into my family's summer travel plans.

This year, however, it's in California. I can't drive to California, and I don't have the money to fly.

And now I see that a lot of the people I wanted to meet last year, but who didn't attend for varying reasons, are going to be there. And that ugly little paranoid voice inside my head tells me that they're coming this year because I'm not. (To which my mother would sensibly reply, "Um, sweetie, you're not that powerful." Which I'm not. But it does bum me out just a little that this year's conference looks to be better-attended than last year's. And that I'm going to miss it.

Anyway.

So I'm two for two in my NaBloPoMo efforts in food blogging. You can read my whiny rant about my daughter's public diss on my baking skills over here.

Elsewhere

2008-07-01T16:33:00.002-10:00

I'm still blogging, just changed venue for the month. Please to visit my other blog and see what I'm up to this month.

The experiment, continued

2008-06-28T03:11:00.003-10:00

Or, more truthfully, discontinued.

Due to circumstances well beyond my control, we gave up on the non-driving experiment. Maybe I'm a wimp, but I couldn't figure out how to help my boss move out of his apartment without cranking up the minivan. And I couldn't figure out how to purchase food and liquor for his going-away party without driving.

So yes, we drove during not-driving-week. About 4 miles in all. Which still isn't bad, but it means the experiment failed this time.

But I don't think this failure proves terribly much. How often, in a person's lifetime, does one's manager develop serious visa problems and have to leave the country with 20 days' notice? I'm thinking it's a once in a lifetime thing. (And I'm not going to say much about it except that I hate it and I've cried more about this situation than I've cried over any work situation in the last nine years. He's fantastic and I adore his wife and I'm going to miss them horribly and I have some anxiety about what's going to happen next at work.)

New topic.

The kids are back from their week in northwest Arkansas, and I must say, they're a lot of fun. I can't honestly say that I miss them all that much when they're gone (mainly because we keep ourselves busy and don't have much opportunity to miss them), but I love it when they're home. The girl and I spent much of yesterday afternoon and evening cuddling on the couch, after she emerged from email land and got sucked into the movie I was halfway watching (I was halfway sleeping). We were both tired, and I think she was needing some Mom time.

A few years ago, I wouldn't have let her watch "First Knight," because it deals with the Arthur/Guinevere/Lancelot story, which is a bit, well, adult with the whole forbidden love thing. But I also clearly remember being about her age and wishing with all my heart that my parents would let me see "Excalibur" when it came out in the theater. (They considered my request seriously, even went to see the movie, and then denied my appeals. I saw it years later and "Meh", but I saw their point.) But "First Knight" is PG-13, and the love story part was quite tame, and the battle gore didn't bother her in the Narnia movies, so I decided it wasn't inappropriate.

What was funny was how she fell into watching the movie. She had come into the living room to tell me that the phone was for me, but then she sat down just because she wasn't doing anything else. At first she just glanced at the screen, but then I caught her getting interested. And then she was so interested that she asked me to pause the movie when she went to the kitchen for a snack. We talked about what was going on (she's never seen "Camelot" but has seen "The Sword and the Stone" so she was a little familiar with the story) and we both predicted when things were about to go sour.

And then it was over, but we found the second half of "Talladega Nights," which the kids and I think is hilarious but Craig thinks is incredibly stupid. By this time, Alex had joined us and watched it with us (although he was heartily disappointed that the dinner table scene, particularly the "spider monkey" line, had already taken place).

Watching my children watch movies gives me a great view inside their minds. I can tell a lot by what makes them laugh in comedies or what gets their attention in adventure movies. Alex doesn't enjoy battle scenes (and, as a result, didn't much love "Prince Caspian") but loves goofy comedy (and has become a fan of Nick at Night sitcom reruns). The girl is starting to "get" adult humor, and watching her laugh at off-color jokes makes the jokes much funnier to me. The laugh is different. It's like she knows that she "shouldn't" be laughing, but she can't help it.

They're home for a week, then it's off to Michigan for three weeks. I know Craig and I will enjoy the change of pace that occurs when we're child-free, but I also know we'll be happy to have them return. The laughter most of all.

The Experiment, Day One

2008-06-23T14:32:00.002-10:00

The kids are out of town again, for their second week (of six) this summer. They've had an alternating-weeks schedule up to this point: two weeks out of school, one week with my parents, one week home, now one week with Craig's family, to be followed by another week at home, then just about four weeks with my parents.

We've been enjoying this (or a similar) arrangement for the past few summers. Our childless state allows us to do things we don't usually do, like eating dinner at 10 p.m. or playing strip poker.

This year, however, we've decided to try something different. Sure, we could have chosen to get into the new show "Swingtown", but that's not really our style. Instead, we're remaining STD-free and going green! That's right; we're not driving all week. The car will remain in the driveway and we'll explore other forms of transportation to meet our needs this week.

We do have a few advantages. I live two blocks from my job, roughly a seven-minute commute on foot. And Craig is working there (temporarily) these days, too. So there's no driving to work anyway. We also live almost in downtown Memphis, and our gym is an easy bike ride away. Along that bike ride, we pass a small grocery store and a drug store, so we could pick up any necessities there.

Today was day one, and we did use our bikes to run an urgent errand. (There was no wine in the house!) Eight-tenths of a mile each way took no time at all - not even far enough to work up a sweat, even in Memphis's summer heat.

So today, success. Tomorrow? We'll see. There's a plan to visit the gym and then pick up food for dinner. I think we can do it.

Work update

2008-06-17T16:07:00.003-10:00

Last time I blogged about work, we were a few days away from my new store's grand opening. Now that's almost a month behind us, so I can share what's happened.

1. Sales are up, way up. Like 100% or more higher. Like our revenue for June (yes, we're only halfway through the month) is already 1.5 times higher than our revenue for last June (which was a very low sales month). We're already ahead of May, which was the best month to date since the old store opened (because the new store was open for one week in May). Job security.

2. Service and accuracy are good. Very good, actually. We get shopped by a secret shopper three times a quarter, and the report from our first shop at the new store just came in. On the objective items (wait time, drink temperature, etc.) we scored 100% (!!!!) and on service we scored the equivalent of a B+. Which is really exactly what I would have wanted, because it gives the staff something to build on.

3. By the way...dream job? Secret shopper for Starbucks.

4. The staff seems to be gelling nicely. Some issues here and there, but I think that's more about almost all of the staff being under 20 years old. Nothing too serious, and nothing nearly as serious as what I was dealing with before.

5. I haven't worked a 12-13 hour day in three weeks. 'Nuff said, right?

So yeah, it's pretty good. I'm happy.

Eleven years, three days

2008-06-14T17:35:00.003-10:00

So here's the thing.

My baby isn't a baby.

Eleven years ago, Craig and I brought a baby home from the hospital. I would be lying if I said she was a tiny baby - she wasn't, at a round eight pounds, five ounces, nineteen inches long - but she was the smallest one I'd ever held. And also the first one that I'd made. It was kind of a big deal, at least to us.

Eleven years and three days have passed quickly. We've watched her learn to crawl, then walk, then run. We've tracked her vocabulary until her words were to numerous to count. We witnessed as she learned her ABCs and numbers and colors. We helped her learn to write her name and admired her scribbled pictures.

And we've helped her with book reports and science projects. We've attended piano recitals and choir concerts. We've experimented with hair colors and hosted sleepovers and read book after book at her bedside, and sung "Puff the Magic Dragon" too many times to count.

And now she's become this gorgeous young woman, almost as tall as I, wearing shoes bigger than mine, with blossoming curves and more and more glimpses of the woman she's becoming.

I find myself alternating between sadness and infatuation with her new beauty.

When I use the word sadness, it's only because I don't know a better word. I'm not sad that she's growing up. No, quite the contrary. I enjoy the present Susie so much - and I wouldn't trade her for her toddler, or preschooler, or early elementary self. The sadness is more that this, the wonder that is her maidenhood, will end all too soon.

And when I mention beauty, I feel a need to justify it. Because I don't really mean, at least not entirely, physical beauty. Sure, as her mother, I think she's the prettiest girl ever to walk this earth, and I'd be happy to fight you if you say otherwise, but that's not really what has me so ensnared.

No, what has me so smitten is deeper. She has a beauty that shines through her eyes. She's so very alive. So vital. So funny. So alert. So confident. So graceful. So willing, and able, to negotiate the confusing maze that is tween-ness.

The girl has skills. She's good at the social thing. She's good at music. She's a great student. She's got the entire church wrapped around her finger, and has since she was a toddler. She's healthy, smart, and funny. She's the perfect sister, and the perfect daughter.

And she's reaching the age where it's becoming hard to write about her. She knows I'm writing, and she hasn't protested. But I feel a greater need to give her some privacy. Potty training stories are cute and funny, but her life is now hers, much more than it's mine.

I also, more than I ever have, feel that I need to protect her from the world. She's entering rocky territory. Sure, she'll handle it fine. She handles rocky territory like a mountain goat. But I don't want her to ever tell me that I made her life more difficult by writing about her on the internet.

So Susie will no longer be a major character in this blog. I can't say she won't be around, even in photos. She's too funny, too engaging, too amazing, for me to never mention. And she's too photogenic to leave out.

But she's growing up. And I respect who she's becoming. I have a feeling she'll be one of my favorite women, one day. All too soon.

Day Zero

2008-05-24T07:20:00.002-10:00

My new employees and I just spent two weeks training in preparation for my new store's opening. It was a good process, with lots of team-building opportunities built into the process. Since all but one of my new staff members are under 20, and all are female, it was not a difficult process to see these people draw together.

Tuesday is day one. While I'm sure it will be a very, very busy day, we're probably lucky that it's a holiday week, because that will keep us from being as busy as we would have been if we'd opened in, say, mid-November.

Each manager in my department is included in a weekend and holiday rotation: our department works every day. Since my store opens Tuesday, I had volunteered to work Memorial Day. Realistically, I'd probably go in anyway, if only to open up the store so the new employees could have a little more practice time (which all of them want), and to do some prep work so Tuesday morning would go more smoothly. Of course, I'll probably regret that decision come 4:00 Monday morning, when the alarm sounds and I have to get to work before 5:00.

It's been a hard two months. I've worked more twelve-plus hour days in the past month than I had, combined, in my life. Arriving at work around 6:30 to get the old store ready to open, working in the store until training started, attending training, checking on the old store, back to training, catching up on the "desk" part of my job (which has been sorely neglected), then checking on the old store before I go home (and usually sticking around to clean it better than it was left by the person who's been helping out), getting home between 5:30-7:00. It's tiring.

My saving grace has been Craig. Not only has he worked (as a temp) in my old store for two weeks (and done as much cleaning as he could, given that he still had to pick up the kids from school at the same time the store closed), he's also planned and cooked every meal served in our house for at least the past two weeks, kept the laundry in check, and been very patient with my obsessive behavior and conversation. He's letting me eat, sleep, and breathe coffee and staffing and retail and shift planning, and even tolerated my going out for drinks with colleagues more than once this week (if I can't see them in the office, I at least get some face time on hotel rooftops and discos).

Here's the thing. It's going very well. Eyes are on me right now, professionally. I took on a failing venture and turned it around. And now I have the opportunity to not just "not fail" but to succeed, quite visibly. This store will be the social center of the hospital. Its success will be credited to me. Its failure will be on my shoulders. I don't have any doubt that the next few months will make or break my career, or at least this portion of it. And given the past few months' successes (33% increase in sales from March to April, and May looks to be at least as good, if not better), I feel like I'm up to the challenge. I've created some good partnerships in other departments (this is me waving to the directors of security and design and construction), and I think that's going to be crucial to my continued success.

I can't help but think back a few years, when my professional life, if you could even call it that, was absolutely the least of my priorities. I worked because I had to, for money and insurance, and I watched the clock all day. All I wanted was to collect my paycheck and go home.

Even though this month has been hard, it's been great. I'm having a fantastic time. I wake up excited about the upcoming day. I go to bed bone-tired. But it's stimulating and challenging and feels like exactly what I was born to do.

Good talk

2008-05-19T18:11:00.003-10:00

Mostly when I say, "Good talk!", I'm being silly or sarcastic. Like when Craig and I have been in the car alone for several minutes without talking. Or when we talk about nothing at all.

But sometimes when I say, "Good talk!", I mean it.

Last night, the couple I'd approached a few months back, the couple for whom I'd offered to be a surrogate mother, came over for "the talk". The talk that would move us forward or, well, not.

And moving forward seems to be the outcome of the conversation.

I'd rehearsed some of the questions I'd ask. I'd made some notes of topics that bore discussion. The topics were discussed, but some of the questions weren't asked. Not because I lost my nerve or decided they weren't appropriate, but because they weren't necessary.

It was a good talk.

We even discussed continuing the conversation, and documenting the journey, on a new blog. It's empty now, but keep your eyes peeled. There may be some good talk there.

Not now!

2008-05-06T10:18:00.004-10:00

This week is the calm before the storm. If by "calm" you mean hiring two part-time employees, setting up new cash registers, making a presentation to the hospital's administrators, training a temp to mind the "old" store while the staff of the "new" store is in training, making sure all the training materials have arrived, reserving A/V equipment for training, staying in contact with our corporate district manager, and coordinating with outside vendors to reprogram the cash register POS system.

The storm? Two weeks of training, setting up the new store, followed by the first week in the new store. Sounds easier, actually, than the so-called calm. But it won't be.

When I attended training in January, it was much more exhausting than I expected. At the end of every day, I was tired. Tired from dealing with a roomful of people I'd never met before. Tired from the barrage of new information. Tired from making and tasting drinks all day.

This training will be even more tiring, since I'm the manager and it's my store. I've been working with two of my five employees for the past few weeks, but that leaves three who are essentially strangers. And college-age. (I think that's a good thing, but I may live to regret hiring four people under 21. I'll let you know.) And the "old" store will still remain open during the training, and I'm still ultimately responsible for it.

Pesky human cloning. They need to hurry up with that one.

Oh, and did I mention that I left work early with a killer headache, complete with some delightful nausea? I'm hoping that it's stress and not the flu. Because I really don't have the time to be sick.

But my new store looks fantastic and I can't wait until May 27.

Art, I makes it!

2008-05-04T15:06:00.002-10:00

My daughter accused me of looking like a tourist when I took these pictures. But I'm not a tourist. Not at all.

Zombies

2008-05-04T15:01:00.002-10:00

Pictures replace 1000 words, and I've missed a lot of blogging. Please to enjoy these photos of the Zombie March on Downtown Memphis last month.

Grace

2008-04-20T12:16:00.002-10:00

I like to tell people that I have the best job at the hospital. Where other folks spend their working days placing IVs in children, giving parents bad news, rushing grant applications, spending endless hours in labs doing important research, or making difficult decisions about the future of our institution, I get to hang out in the most fun part of the hospital, making coffee for everyone who needs a cup.

Part of the fun is getting to know a cross-section of our hospital...mostly staff, but also visitors and families. I've gotten to know exactly how seven-year-old "Keith" likes his hot chocolate, how a prominent scientist likes his latte, and which coffee blends are favored by post doc researchers.

And then there are the moments that really knock my socks off. There's a parent who comes by our store nearly every day. "Janey" orders the same coffee every time: four cappuccinos, along with four pastries. (Usually she gives me free reign to select the pastries.) This order costs a bit more than $20. Four or five days a week. Yes, that's about $100 per week. Did I mention who the coffee and snacks are for? No? They're for the nurses who are taking care of her daughter.

This woman, about my age, never shows the strain of being in the hospital with a sick child. She is very, very beautiful and her smile lights up the room. She's cheerful and funny, and obviously generous.

And if she were none of those things, given the difficulty of her current situation....1000 miles away from home, with her husband and other daughter just as far away...I wouldn't blame her a bit. If she were cranky or distracted or tearful, I wouldn't be at all surprised.

But she's meeting this challenge with grace and graciousness and gratitude, and I look forward to her daily visit. That visit reminds me that I work in an amazing place, full of amazing people, and that we have so many opportunties, every day, to do good, to make new friends, to make a difference in someone's life.

I'm trying to rise to the challenge. If Janey can be that great with so many obstacles, I can be that great too. My life is pretty easy: my kids are healthy and smart, my husband is great, I have a good job. My list of complaints and worries is short. But the opportunities I have to do better - to be kinder, more generous, more helpful, more inspiring - are ample.

Amazing what a person can learn while making coffee.

Absentee = nothing to write

2008-04-15T16:22:00.002-10:00

I'm peeking out from my hole of work and church responsibilities to tell you, all eight of my readers, that I'm still alive.

The recent major changes at work have led to me working ten-hour days for the past three weeks. It sounds much worse than it is, to be honest. I've come to the conclusion that I've got the best job at the entire hospital, and my new staff is fantastic.

The best part about that statement? Is that I hand-picked each of them. So their success is evidence that I'm cut out for this management position (which I am, but confirmation is always nice).

In futher job secuity news, our daily and weekly sales are climbing every week, and this week looks to be much bigger than the past two, which were the two best weeks of 2008. Given that sales are generally higher in cold weather, this is pretty great.

But yes, I also have a family. A really fantastic family, actually. And they continue to be fantastic. The school year is winding down, which means concerts, programs, and the dreaded TCAP tests. My kids were blessed with the "performs well on standardized tests" genes, so this is not as stressful for us as for other families.

I owe the internet a post about my wonderful son and his wonderful birthday party. And I'll write it soon, but not yet. I was at work before 7 and left after 5:30. Am tired.

Back, for a second

2008-04-06T15:20:00.002-10:00

Just want to make sure everyone knows that the Memphis Tigers rock! I can't wait until tomorrow's game. It's a great moment for my beloved city - I sure hope we can hold on for one more game.

Day off

2008-03-28T00:26:00.000-10:00

Since I worked this weekend, I was off today.

My dad left at lunchtime today to return home; he'd been here since Saturday afternoon, having driven here with the kids to return them to us, as well as to assemble the headboard he'd built for us.

After enjoying breakfast and a trip to the river (yes, it's high, but no, I don't think my neighborhood, or any other neighborhood nearby, will be flooded), my dad left in his car.

I spent much of the next few hours cleaning up my bedroom. The new headboard includes bookshelves, so I shelved books (books, I might add, that have been sitting in my room in boxes for many months) and straightened up and changed sheets and dusted and vacuumed. And then, yes, I basked in the cleanness of the room.

This headboard is pretty awesome. I designed it months ago for my dad to build (he's cool like that), and the finished product is actually more impressive than I expected. And the assembly is great in that it easily comes apart into the two bookshelf units (which are a foot deep and a foot wide and six feet tall, quite easily transported via Prius), the fabric-covered board and the top board, which are (obviously) flat. So it can move without being a monster to move.

Oh, and yes, it has built-in lights. Because that's how I roll.

And yes, I know it would be totally mean to tell you how awesome it is and not to post pictures, so here you go. Please to enjoy.

Stress code blue

2008-03-27T04:49:00.003-10:00

My blog is actually a good barometer of my life. The frequency of posts is conversely related to the level of activity in my life.

Take this week, for example. I worked the weekend (which means a 4:00 a.m. wake up), my dad arrived (with my kids) at the house on Saturday afternoon, I've got the church pledge drive kick-off party on Saturday, and I'm interviewing new staff for my new store. There are some other, non-bloggable, bits of work upheaval that are generating a lot of stress.

And then last night, a little more drama entered my life in the form of a very unexpected phone call from a friend who let me know that he has entered a residential treatment program for mental health issues. That's his story, not mine, but it definitely impacted my night.

Later that evening, Craig and I were watching "Top Chef" which made me hungry, so I grabbed a box of ~~crack~~ Cheez-its and was happily munching away when I felt, and heard, the unmistakable sound of stress incarnate.

My jaw.

The TMJ, it has returned.

I did what I could to minimize it, and I'm hoping it works. I took a muscle relaxer and wore my delightful appliance to bed.

When I awoke, it didn't hurt, not exactly, but it definitely felt wrong. The last time this happened, I couldn't eat for two weeks. And while the thought of the easy weight loss that would bring is tempting, it's really the last thing I need right now. Must keep my energy up to get through the next few weeks.

More Ovaltine please?

So I'm told

2008-03-23T03:33:00.005-10:00

April's National Blog Posting Month prompt is "Letters". A quick paste of the email notification I received...

Just a quick note to tell you that the daily blogging
theme for April is going to be LETTERS.

For writers, this can mean letters to the editor, love letters,
fan letters, ransom notes -- I'm not encouraging illegal activity,
but the list is endless.

For typography lovers, it's a month full of fonts!

For photographers, it's license to go out and shoot things
both manmade and natural that resemble
a member of our beloved alphabet.

And as always, if you'd like to be on the
April blogroll of participants, go to nablopomo.com,
click on the Blogrolls tab, and follow the instructions.

It's not April yet, but I'm thinking of the letters I can write. Thank-you notes, apologies, hmmmm.

So, if you were going to write a letter every day, which one would you write first? Would you thank your parents? Would you tell off that mean kid who made you miserable in the fifth grade? Would you write a love letter to your child?

Share in the comments...I'm interested, and I also need ideas!

Facing facts

2008-03-22T07:29:00.004-10:00

Turns out that I have unreasonably low expectations for my son, at least when it comes to his packing skills. He packed a perfectly sane assortment of clothing for the trip, and all I did was merge the contents of two half-empty suitcases into one suitcase. I didn't add or subtract or substitute any of the contents. Yay, son!

Turns out my daughter is probably ready to move out and have kids of her own. Well, not quite, but close. See, on our long road trip to Michigan, we hit a bit of turbulence in the form of my son and a stomach virus. As I later told my mother, if the kids had been five years younger and this had happened, I would've been toast! Instead, after vomit #2 (but #1 in the car), I pulled across three lanes of traffic in Nashville's suburbs, pulled into a Walgreen's parking lot, fished out some cash from my wallet, and sent my daughter inside to buy paper towels and baby wipes. And she did it! No argument, no nervousness about going alone inside a store in a strange city. Just grace and aplomb. Even better, she returned, gave me the change, and informed me that she'd made the executive decision to buy the small package of wipes because she figured I didn't want a case of 500. She was, perhaps, a bit less willing to assist me in cleaning up the mess, but she did score points for being very sweet and solicitous of her miserable brother.

Turns out my son is nearly 5' tall and my daughter is already 5'1 1/2". That makes her only two inches shorter than me. She's TEN!

Turns out that when Craig and I have the house to ourselves, we pretty much behave the same way we do when the kids are around.

Turns out getting up at 4 a.m. to work on a Saturday (and it'll happen again on Sunday) is just as hard as one would expect.

Turns out that I'm really, really glad my kids (and my dad) are getting home today. Even though it's only been since Wednesday morning since I saw them, I miss them.

Turns out I like my new haircut (and will post a picture soon).

St. Patrick's Day

2008-03-17T18:17:00.003-10:00

Instead of the typical "drink enough green beer to think you are actually IN Ireland" approach to St. Pat's, my family did something truly unique today.

We participated in (or at least witnessed) the creation of a new world record.

And even updated a Wikipedia entry.

Hold on loosely

2008-03-13T11:13:00.002-10:00

So I had the kids go upstairs early last night, mainly because I really needed to get some things done, but also because I wanted them to get started on packing for our trip. I didn't tell them to pack, just to get their things ready to pack.

And Alex got ambitious, apparently. Because he called down the stairs that he already had one suitcase entirely packed and was working on his second. And he finished the second, too.

Alex is a well-intentioned boy, but he is just eight.

Any bets as to the contents of these suitcases? Keep in mind they'll be gone a week, need swimwear, and will be in Michigan.

My money is on the following:
Eight shirts
Two pair pants, both sweats
Ten pair underwear
No socks
One swimsuit
Pajama pants
No toothbrush
No toothpaste
Soap
Mini-size shampoo

I can't wait to see how close I am.

Inconveniences

2008-03-12T06:17:00.002-10:00

Things I need to do this week:

Catch up on sleep because the time change is still making me insane.
Write a letter to everyone in my church's congregation that will inspire them to make generous, timely pledges.
Plan the kickoff party for our annual pledge drive.
Pack for the trip to Michigan I'm taking with the kids on Saturday.
Pick up the rental car for that trip.
Design printed material for the pledge drive.
Evaluate my employees' progress on their improvement plans.
Create and submit my inventory order for next week (since I'll be on vacation when it's due).
Generate weekly sales reports (see above).

Things I've done this week:

Not gotten enough sleep.
Disciplined an employee.
Completed espresso training (wow! much caffeine makes me really jumpy!)
Attended church board meeting.
Finished watching the first season of C.S.I.
Monthly financial reports at work.
Watched snow melt.
Looked at the progress of my new store's construction and had a panic attack.
Helped my son create a costume for his class's chess party (he chose to be a pawn).
Coded and balanced my department's monthly invoice (which is so much more work than that sentence can express).
Gave a big box of fabric to someone who will actually use it.

The Secret

2008-03-10T06:43:00.004-10:00

The characters: Craig and I

The setting: Saturday night, in the rare situation of the children being at a sleepover. We've run some errands, eaten dinner, and are heading to the video store.

Him: We should go to the other video store, because I'm in the mood to watch weird videos, not really a movie.

Me: But I really don't like that video store, and we're already in the parking lot of the other one.

Him: Whatever. You sure you even want to rent videos?

Me: (thinks of renting all seasons of CSI so I can watch them in order) Yeah.

Him: Let's see what we can find.

We enter the video store and start with new releases...and keep going, and going, not finding anything, until...

Him: Hey, it's the DVD of The Secret! Woot!

Me: Isn't that the book about magic? That Oprah likes?

Him: (sarcastically) Duh! Yeah! This'll be hilarious!

Me: ... ?

Him: You can get season one of CSI over there.

We check out, amused by our bizarre combination of rentals which Craig determines makes us "Yuppies."

Scene 2: A little later, with wine and The Secret playing

Him: Where's the wacky sketches? I want something silly to happen.

Me: The opening menu reminds me of Harry Potter a little.

Him: Isn't that guy the brother of a sportscaster?

Me: Probably. And what kind of job is "metaphysician" anyway?

Him: That's the guy who wrote that book about men being from Mars. Hey, didn't we watch that show with him on PBS? When he pretty much castrated all of mankind?

Me: That's the one. Oh, that guy is a "philosopher". Isn't that a nice way of saying "unemployed"?

Him: Huh. This isn't as funny as I thought.

We watch the video in silence for a few minutes, learning all about the Law of Attraction.

In a few minutes, on my second glass of wine...

Me: Okay. I get it. If I sit here and think about how I want a ba-billion dollars, I'll get it.

Him: Seems right to me.

Me: Hey Universe! I want a ba-billion dollars!!

laughing

Him: One problem. There's no such number as a ba-billion. You're just confusing the Universe.

Me: Okay, Universe. You probably can't handle that request. I guess I'll settle for a trillion. By next week, okay?

Him: Better.

We pause to reflect on that

Him: Hey, what would we even do with a trillion dollars?

Me: I'm sure we'd sort it out.

Him: You'd get mad at my answer.

Me: What? Strip clubs? Hookers?

Him: No! Ew! No, I think I'd walk around in bad neighborhoods and give people some serious money. Not like $20 or even $100.

Me: Like $20,000?

Him: Yeah. That would be cool.

Me: Yeah, it would. But also money would go to church. They could name a building after us. The ba-billion building.

Him: I wouldn't want to move to a really big house.

Me: Just say no to Mc-Mansions.

Him: And I don't really care about cars.

Me: I'd buy new cars. But nothing fancy, I promise. We'll be the humblest ba-billionaires ever.

Him: Trillionaires.

Me: Whatever. Let's watch CSI.

More lists

2008-03-08T04:22:00.003-10:00

I've examined, a little, what I accomplished by age 30. I'm more than halfway through my 30s now, so it's reasonable to look at what's happened and what I'd like to see happen before the big 4-0.

My 29th birthday went down in my memory as the worst birthday ever. My head was in a bad place. I had two toddlers, was working part-time as a bank teller, was trying (and failing) to run a small business at home, and money was scarce. I'd had a list in mind of things I'd do and a standard of living I'd attain by my 30th birthday, and it was looking like I'd fall way short of my goal. I recall many tears that day.

By my next birthday, however, I'd reached a better place. I had a better job, finances were getting back to where they needed to be, and I had a wonderful little group of friends who helped me celebrate the end of my 20's in full Logan's Run regalia.

I don't remember making any lists at that point of things I wanted to do before I turned 40, but there is always a bit of a mental list.

At 30, I hoped by 40, life would look like this:

Full-time job with a salary higher than I'd earned at my best-paying job
Renovate our house
Buy a new car
Kids doing well in school
Maintain close friendships
Become more active at church

And, halfway there, I'm pleased to report that I've accomplished all but one of those goals (well, we didn't exactly renovate the old house; we bought a new one, but I think that's close enough). We still haven't bought a new car. We've purchased (and sold) several used cars. I know our beloved minivan is nearing the end of its usefulness (151,000 miles and climbing), but I'm still reluctant to take on a car payment. But I have a feeling that we'll accomplish that goal before I turn 40. Even if I don't want to. I drive very little - just on weekends, really - but Craig spends a lot of time driving. And the aging minivan may not be able to keep up much more.

There are a few more things to add to the list. See, those close friendships? While they are still very healthy and happy relationships, there is a geographic issue that didn't exist in 2001. I'd love to be able to say, by age 40, that I have close friends who are local. I have several "good" local friends, but those relationships haven't deepened to the BFF point like the New York and Montana contingent. Don't get me wrong; I'm not complaining. Many people never meet their soul sisters. And I have. I just wish I could have one more that lived nearby. And if she had kids that were compatible with my kids, even better.

A more recent goal that's come up is church-related. When I wanted to get more involved, I didn't necessarily mean that I wanted to take on a leadership role. At 30, I was still a bit gun-shy about high-profile church positions. After all, I'd worked at another church and was still licking my wounds from how things had turned out. But now, nine years after that part of my life, I feel a new passion about my own lay ministry. And I've taken on several roles of increasing responsibility at our church, from chairing the Religious Education committee to chairing the Search committee for our new Director of Religious Education, to serving on the Board. Most recently (and currently) I'm chairing our congregation's annual pledge drive, and a few weeks ago I was asked to step into the Vice Presidency, as the current vice president has opted to bow out since she's about to have a baby.

While the Vice President isn't necessarily a shoe-in to become President, that's the typical pattern. Since I'll be serving the remainder of the current Vice President's term, that means I likely will become our congregation's President next summer. This will be historic for our congregation: I'd be the youngest person to serve in that position in our history.

Oh, and just because I am shallow, I'd like to end my 30's at the same weight I started. That means I have a little work to do, but not too much. I think it's attainable.

And if it's not, I'm guessing that I'll have a good sense of humor about it by then. What with the perspective of age, right?

Keeping the dust bunnies at bay

2008-03-03T12:07:00.004-10:00

Okay. I wrote another post and saved it because it wasn't done, but I just re-read it and fell asleep just from the second paragraph. I've decided to spare you the unplanned nap.

And because I am completely lacking in creativity, especially when it comes to blog entry topics, I've decided to borrow from a few different people and make some lists.

Back in December, when it was time to make resolutions (or whatever), I made a list of 8 things for 2008. Which I'm pretty much failing. Dismally. I still have 10 more months to get my act together, and maybe I will. But, hey, maybe it's the process of making the list that is more important. Or interesting?

Anyway, yeah. I'm going to make lists for a while. If nothing else, they might give me some good ideas for future posts. Or maybe you readers can help a sistah out and leave some topic suggestions in the comments? Perhaps?

So here we go: a series of lists comparing my 20-year-old self and my 30-year-old self.

Things that, at age 20, I thought I wanted to do before I turned 30, but weren't a big deal by the time I turned 30.

Be a painter that sells paintings. (Truth be told, I actually accomplished this in college...I sold a series of three paintings for about $30.)
Get a Master's degree. (I got close and never finished. And recently decided that I'm totally okay with that.)
Own a new car.
Have a glamorous career (related, but not the same, to the painter thing).
Join the Junior League (again, full disclosure, I had a chance but I was in my early 20's at the time, and I didn't want to join quite that early, and by the time I was 30, I was running in a totally different social circle).
Live in a warehouse/loft downtown.

And, the corollary list: things I accomplished by 30 that I would never have guessed (at age 20) would have mattered to me (or happened at all).

Owned a house in midtown Memphis.
Bought a used Ford Escort station wagon (the first car I bought on my own).
Had two kids (I mostly wanted kids, eventually, when I was 20, but I didn't think I'd have them as young as I did).
Taught school in Mississippi.
Became a vegetarian and then un-became a vegetarian.
Got a dog.
Worked at a church.
Started a business.

And then the list of things I set out, at age 20, to accomplish by 30, and accomplished:

Got married.
Adopted cats.
Worked at an art museum (two, actually).
Took some fun trips with my husband.
Worked toward a Master's degree.
Volunteered at the Humane Society.

Still here

2008-02-26T16:17:00.002-10:00

Sorry for the absence. It's been a busy few days. So you get bullet points. Lucky you!

Saturday was spent shopping for the Oscar party we hosted Sunday. We planned our errands well, finishing (well, mostly) in time to eat some Mexican food then get home and watch the most frustrating basketball game ever.
Sunday was spent preparing for, then hosting, said Oscar party. It was a good party, with nine guests and food, as usual, themed to go with the best picture nominees. Can I just say that if there hadn't been a scene involving a grocery sack of baguettes in Michael Clayton, that movie would have been impossible to pair with food? Because George Clooney never eats or drinks in the whole movie. Juno was much easier, for obvious reasons.
I'm working on my first performance review as a supervisor at the Corporation. I'm not really enjoying it.
We just got home from a very, very long school program. It was for Black History Month, but it was called the "Brotherhood" program. I think I need to bring to someone's attention that by choosing to not use the word "Black" they instead used a word that is not a bit inclusive, but, in fact, leaves out 51% of the population. Hint: "Unity" is a lovely word.
I have a bad feeling that American Idol could turn me into an alcoholic. It's a bad, bad season this year.

Now that it's all written down, it doesn't seem like much. But it's felt like more. I'm delighted to have no plans for the next three evenings, because it's going to be an amazingly packed weekend. I just hope March doesn't speed by quite as quickly as February did, because I'm a little stunned that we're in the last few days of the month.

400

2008-02-19T14:14:00.002-10:00

When I was logging on to Blogger, I was planning to write an update-y post, mostly about work, but then I saw that this was going to be my 400th post, so I thought it should be more, well, special.

But for special? I got nothin'. I've been doing this get up, go to work, come home, be tired, go to bed thing this week, and there's just not much left. I did successfully complete my end of my son's homework (quizzing him on his multiplication tables) but I will also admit that I tried to outsource it to multiplication.com (that, my friends, was a nightmare...timed tests make him very, very stressed). But beyond that, there's little to say.

So here's the update-y part of the post: I had my first "performance improvement" type conversation as a manager. Actually, my first AND second. Within an hour of each other. (Yes, that was planned.) It wasn't as hard as I thought it would have been (seriously, I was dreading this). But then again, I've fired volunteers before (THAT, my friends, is hard). I think things will work out, mostly, and I'm quite optimistic about the future in my department. We have some very, very good leadership, and a few potential rising stars in our field. It's going to be fun to watch things unfold through the summer.

This 400th post thing is making me feel pressured to write something good. And the bizarre spike in traffic my site has experienced for the past few days isn't helping the pressure to write well. I like to think that most of the time my writing is pretty good (my boss thinks so, anyway), but lately it's been less-than-creative. Or insightful. Perhaps it's more a function of being tired and maybe getting sick and then being preoccupied about the whole surrogacy thing.

My headspace is a little more occupied than usual because of that, but I don't think I need to spill it all yet. It's, to use the completely wrong word, premature. We're still on "if", not "when." And it may not even work anyway. So allowing myself to spend too much time there is not wise. I tend to spend a lot of time thinking about the future anyway (not the distant future, more like the next three, six, ten months), and this particular situation is not definite. And I need to remember not to treat it that way. But then, there are conversations that need to take place, sooner than later. I suppose it's probably time to get Craig back into the mix, right? Given that the couple seems to be leaning toward a tentative "yes", it's probably time to re-introduce the topic. He's not been involved in these exchanges, though he and I have discussed it (briefly) once.

But I approached the couple before he and I had thoroughly hashed it out. Because I didn't know if it even merited a long discussion (there was that possibility that they would have been entirely disinterested in such an offer). And now that there is a conversation underway with the other folks, and it's going the way it's going, there needs to be a long, and maybe not easy, conversation with my husband (who mostly does not read my blog, so please don't bring it up to him if you know him.)

But I somehow don't have the heart to bring up such a serious, and life-altering (at least for a year) topic during Oscar week. With our party coming up on Sunday, he's already a bit more stressed than usual. Yes, that probably makes me sound like a big chicken, making lame excuses, but I already knew that, because the conversation I had with my employees today should have happened two weeks ago. (Maybe the fact that it wasn't horrible with them might convince me that this conversation, too, will probably be fine, even if it's not easy.) Because nobody promised easy, right?

A Letter to my Body

2008-02-17T04:40:00.002-10:00

Over at BlogHer, Suzanne started an interesting conversation. And, being the consummate joiner, I'm playing along.

Dear Body,

We've been through a lot together. Things seem to be better these days. Maybe because of that radioactive pill I took a few summers ago. It felt strange, conspiring with the medical establishment to kill part of myself, but that part was malfunctioning so much, fighting against the rest of me, that it had to be done.

That summer was hard on us, body. We suffered through high doses of steroids and still sport the changes it caused in our face and belly. Sometimes my face still surprises me when I look in the mirror or at photographs. I don't think of my face as being as round as it is, has been since the summer of 2004.

Up to and including that summer, a lot of my adult decisions were influenced by that pesky thyroid gland. I was afraid to exercise more than walking and a little yoga, because my heart was already working itself into a frenzy, just sitting still. I approached my first pregnancy with more than a little fear: fear that I wouldn't get pregnant, fear that the physical stress of pregnancy would cause my thyroid to spin even farther out of control.

But you worked it out, didn't you? You had no problem getting, and staying, pregnant. You kept me safe, kept the baby safe, even through a car accident. You built two healthy and strong babies and more than enough milk to nourish them beyond a year.

The changes my body experienced during pregnancy were exciting while they were happening, and I was delighted with my new curves. I even let art students share the joy. But after the babies were born, I looked at my rapidly-deflated belly and didn't know what to think of it. The art teachers called and I didn't want to model anymore. I was happy to share my pregnant body, but my postpartum body wanted privacy.

But all that is behind us, at least for now. And I started taking you to the gym. After all, we're not getting any younger, and I want to keep us around for a while. It seemed fair enough that with all you've done to take care of me and my kids, I could spend some time taking care of you. Working out with you feels much better than I expected.

And I'm reveling again. No, we're not 22 anymore. Some of those soft places will stay soft. But we feel stronger, and we're looking pretty good. Craig appreciates and enjoys you.

So thanks, body, for a pretty good 36 years. We've been through a lot together, and I can't wait to see what happens next.

Love,
Kaleigh

Huh

2008-02-16T19:40:00.004-10:00

Interesting.

The feedback (which, yes, I requested) from my last post gave me plenty to consider. But the message I got from the female member of the couple in question (which I just read today) is also interesting. I'd characterize it as receptive.

Which is interesting.

But, anonymous commenter, no, I won't send you a picture of my boobs. Maybe if you try hard enough you can find a drawing of them from my art school modeling days. I still regret that I never asked any of the students for a copy of a drawing. Because some of them were good.

In other news, Craig and I were supposed to have a date night tonight. Damn those kids and their sick sickness. Not only did sleepover hosts #1 have to cancel because of kid illness, hosts #2 also canceled. And really, we would have been in the wrong to have sent our kids to spend the night with anyone anyway, since they were full of pestilence too. Thank goodness for the buy one, get one free on Walgreen's cough and cold medicine. We may go through a whole bottle before Tuesday. Score one for the drug store, zero for the disco.

And we were even on the V.I.P. list. (Which impressed the crap out of our kids, who really couldn't imagine us at a disco.)

Your feedback, please

2008-02-12T17:58:00.002-10:00

Let me preface this post with a disclaimer: no decision has been made. All parties involved, in fact, have not discussed this for more than a few minutes, and no discussion at all has occurred that involves all the parties at the same time. So don't expect anything to come to fruition in the immediate future, if at all.

Something's been tugging at me. Keeping me up at night. Waking me up from a dead sleep in the middle of the night. While some people might say that God is talking to me, I'm not entirely convinced. But I do know that if something is forcing itself into my consciousness, I need to pay attention.

I'm seriously considering being a surrogate mother for a couple I know.

They never asked. They never even expressed any interest in pursuing such a course of action. They've been trying to conceive for some time, and at some expense, and it hasn't worked. Craig and I, on the other hand, practically looked lovingly at each other across the table and conceived our kids. Fertility? Is not a problem for me. I've carried two healthy pregnancies to term, both resulting in healthy children.

And before you ask, I don't want another baby. Not in the least. Craig and I are both very, very happy with our family's size and have no interest whatsoever in increasing it. The children, too, do not want another sibling. So this is not coming from a place of "I want a bay-bee!!!" I don't. I'm not sentimental about pregnancy, nor am I sentimental about childbirth. In fact, I'm pretty much resigned to the idea that if this happens, I'd have another Cesarean section. After two sections, I'd be hard pressed to find a doctor in this conservative medical town to attend a VBAC. And honestly, I don't know if I would want to make the emotional investment in trying again. After what happened last time, I don't think I'm up for the disappointment of trying and "failing."

This couple? I don't get to tell their story. It's not mine to tell. I'll just say what I feel. They would be wonderful parents. It's a horrible injustice of random, cruel nature and nothing more that they haven't made a baby. I hate to see wasted potential, and they just ooze "fantastic parents" potential.

It's a leap, I know, to go from idly musing about how it sucks that some people who should be parents aren't to thinking that I can do something about it. And maybe it's just a bit narcissistic on my part.

But it's keeping me up at night. And maybe there's a reason for that, a reason bigger than what I can comprehend.

Fessing Up

2008-02-11T13:22:00.000-10:00

Since I subjected you to this meme last week, I thought it would only be fair to give you the correct answers. I know your anticipation was killing you. And I couldn't stand increasing the body count. See how much I love you?

1. I modeled nude, for money, during my second pregnancy. I earned about $200. For sleeping.

That one is absolutely true. I modeled for life drawing classes at two colleges after reading a newspaper article about the difficulty art teachers were having finding models. I figured a pregnant body would be interesting to draw. It was fun. If you're wondering, no, it's not cold. They crank up the heat for the naked person. And after the first two seconds, it wasn't even remotely awkward. I was able to carry on conversations with the instructors and also, yes, sleep. I fell asleep many times. Laying completely still. Except my belly, which sometimes wiggled.

2. Even though I've lived out of the country and traveled pretty extensively during my childhood, I haven't left the United States since a year before I got married.

My mom outed me on that one. It's false. I've left the country several times since 1992. Mostly to Canada, but also to the Bahamas.

3. I've never voted for a winning candidate, whether in a major or local election. Turns out, I'm just not in the mainstream. Period.

Lie. I voted for Clinton in 1992, my first presidential election, and we know how that turned out. That being said, I've lost many more than I've won.

4. Until I started dating the man who later became my husband, I was a rabid college football fan, and even missed dinner in the college refectory if a game went into overtime.

Very true. I toy with the idea of getting into football again, but I really don't have time.

5. I dye my hair so frequently that I honestly have no idea what my natural color is. Or if I have any grey hairs.

False. I know my hair color. And how much of it's grey. Which is too much. Hence the hair color.

6. I'm unreasonably afraid of tornadoes.

Nope. That's false. Weather doesn't really scare me.

7. I won't eat organ meat. Of any kind. It's gross.

False. Liver is one of my favorites.

8. I've tried, but never succeeded, at giving blood. One time I was denied because I was under the required weight (110 lbs.) and once because I still had the sniffles. As a result, I force my husband (definitely more than 110 lbs.) to give blood since I never can.

False, but barely. I've only successfully given blood twice. I tried to give platelets at work, but that was a disaster. A painful disaster. With a lot of bruising. And heat packs. And did I mention pain?

So now you know the story. Hope it was worth the wait.

Job security

2008-02-08T12:08:00.001-10:00

My new area of supervision at work got a surprise visit from the health inspector today.

Our score? 99/100.

Very nice.

Plus, that means that my madd supervision skillz must be working.

Thank you

2008-02-06T16:44:00.000-10:00

I suppose that you already know that my fair city got hit pretty hard by strong storms last night. Warehouses were destroyed, homes were destroyed, even a mall sustained major damage. My family spent hours glued to the radar pictures on the television, seeing ourselves in the direct path of a tornado for a few minutes (fortunately for us, it veered east, and we were out of its path). Friends of mine saw tornadoes. Friends of mine lost neighbors.

In my house, we had a panicking dog and a panicking boy. My sweet son has a rather irrational fear of weather, particularly hurricanes and tornadoes. Fortunately, we've been able to talk him down from his hurricane fear (it helps that we live very, very far from saltwater), but any serious threat of tornadoes is a guarantee that he'll be at best, fearful, at worst, a complete wreck.

Last night he veered closer to the "complete wreck" side of the scale. There were tears. There was a ten-minute-long episode of such fear that I could barely be near him. He planted himself in the laundry room (the safest room in the house for such events) and assumed the "duck and cover" position. Keep in mind that there was no tornado heading even remotely toward our house at that point. I finally convinced him to watch Hannah Montana in my bedroom, demonstrating that the trek from my bed to my closet (the other, more comfortable "safe room" in the house) took only seconds.

Because a second line of storms was forecast to come through the area around 10 p.m., we dragged the futon mattress downstairs so the kids could sleep in our room. I think it gave him peace of mind, and he slept well (except when the second front came through, with astonishing force).

But the title of this post is "Thank you" and there's a reason.

Some people may think I'm a bit odd, in that my usual online routine includes checking weather.com. I almost always know what the day's weather is predicted to be. And this storm system? Was no surprise. As early as Sunday afternoon, I knew that Tuesday was going to be an interesting day. There was a "Special Weather Statement" posted, warning that conditions would be ripe for such storms. By Monday, the forecast had been narrowed down to the point that the predicted storms were projected to arrive between 1 and 9 p.m.

The first raindrop hit my neighborhood at 4 p.m. Just as predicted. The worst was over before 11 p.m.

Even though I whined (and wined) about missing American Idol and House, our local weather forecasters kept us informed, alerting folks when the funnel clouds began forming, figuring out the path these storms would follow, and telling people to take cover.

They were exactly on target. And for that, I'd like to buy all the weather forecasters a Coke. They all deserve a nice day off.

In lieu of a real post

2008-02-05T17:09:00.001-10:00

Here's a meme (or something like it) that I shamelessly lifted from Hola, Isabel. And, without further ado, six lies and two truths about me:

1. I modeled nude, for money, during my second pregnancy. I earned about $200. For sleeping.

2. Even though I've lived out of the country and traveled pretty extensively during my childhood, I haven't left the United States since a year before I got married.

3. I've never voted for a winning candidate, whether in a major or local election. Turns out, I'm just not in the mainstream. Period.

4. Until I started dating the man who later became my husband, I was a rabid college football fan, and even missed dinner in the college refectory if a game went into overtime.

5. I dye my hair so frequently that I honestly have no idea what my natural color is. Or if I have any grey hairs.

6. I'm unreasonably afraid of tornadoes.

7. I won't eat organ meat. Of any kind. It's gross.

8. I've tried, but never succeeded, at giving blood. One time I was denied because I was under the required weight (110 lbs.) and once because I still had the sniffles. As a result, I force my husband (definitely more than 110 lbs.) to give blood since I never can.

So, if you think you know the truth, comment. I'm missing the comments. Please?

Science fair

2008-02-02T10:38:00.001-10:00

I just finished my portion of Susie's science fair project.

Let that sink in for a moment.

See, these science fair projects are serious business. Last year, Susie and two friends teamed up to do a pretty good experiment (the effects of different liquids on tooth enamel), and they took third place. I'm convinced that they would have taken first if I had been more proactive and helped them more with the graphic design of the project.

This year, Susie has a new partner and a new topic. The two girls chose nutrition as their topic (at my suggestion...after all, I have good resources at work), and their experiment was good: for one week, they ate a typical diet and kept a food diary. For week two, they first planned a "balanced" diet based on the recommendations at www.mypyramid.gov (good stuff there, by the way), then kept a food diary again. The food diary was input (mostly by them, but also by me) into www.my-calorie-counter.com, a good-enough site that calculates calories, fiber, fat, and the like.

My portion of the project involved taking that data and feeding it into an Excel spreadsheet, then creating a zillion graphs depicting the recommended calories, fat grams, etc., comparing them to the actual calories, etc., consumed, then overlaying the percentage above or below the RDA the girls consumed.

I learned something that I didn't tell the girls. True, it's not a scientific sample, but the results played out as I expected. Susie, as a middle-class white kid with post-graduate-school-educated parents, had a pretty darn good diet in her "control" week. Her nutritional intake was very similar in weeks one and two. Her partner, on the other hand, is economically disadvantaged, African American, and has a less-than-stable family situation. I don't know her mother's educational attainment, but I suspect it's minimal based on the contact I've had with her. And this girl's diet? Is a mess. It's almost a textbook diet for how to get heart disease, an epidemic health problem in the lower income African American community. Her sodium intake is generally 2-3 times the recommended daily limit. Her sugar intake is high. Her saturated fat is high. Her fiber consumption is about half of what it should be.

But what's most disturbing about her results is that her intake of "bad" stuff (fat, saturated fat, sodium, sugar) was markedly WORSE during the Food Pyramid week. I'm not sure why. Perhaps her mother was not able to provide a balanced diet that adhered to the eating plan the girls had designed. I know her mother did not understand the plan, because she called me last Sunday evening, after I'd dropped the child off at home, asking me, "What is this mess she just handed me?" The "mess" was her daughter's food chart. I went over the project with her, explaining the experiment and what they were trying to accomplish. I explained portioning and what foods needed to be consumed in what quantities. The family does not have a computer, so I couldn't direct her to a website.

I talked to the girls today about their results as I was creating the charts. I was gentle when I told Susie's friend about the issues in her diet. I explained that she needed to look at product nutritional labels when she and her mom went to the grocery store. And I beat my favorite dead horse. Lunchables? Are the worst thing in the world that kids can eat. Except maybe rat poison.

The girls did a great job writing up their findings. And I'm about to head to the office to print all these beautiful charts (in color), as well as some pages from the food pyramid site. They'll put the whole thing together and (hopefully) win a prize next week.

I hope they learned something. And make changes accordingly. As they wrote in their report, "It's hard not to eat too much salt and sugar."

Mom, don't read this

2008-01-29T17:39:00.000-10:00

Okay, if you're easily grossed out, stop reading.

Somehow the conversation between Craig and me comes to prostate health. Let's blame the television. I blame it for everything else.

And he asks how old he's supposed to be before he needs to get that checked out. I tell him. And then he asks if it's possible for the doctor (she's a woman) to maybe wear a cute outfit (boots? leather?) before she checks him out for such ailments.

And then he keeps it up. "Will she maybe wear a wig? Will she get into a character? Will she get a costume? Will she spank me first? Could she pull my hair a little?"

As I write this, he's still talking. "She can't just go at this willy-nilly; it's an event!"

Am I wrong to document his sickness to the internets? Because, in his words, "If it's wrong, I don't wanna be right."

I hope to God that my doctor doesn't read this blog.

Long distance

2008-01-27T18:31:00.001-10:00

I'm not usually a phone person. I'm much happier with a quick email conversation most of the time. Or even an open thread while watching television. But occasionally I really jones to talk to one of my girlfriends, the two most crucial of whom live far, far away.

It's been far too long since I spoke to the friend in New York. With three kids, she's way too busy to keep up her blog, and it was time to break the silence, despite the hour's time difference. So I called her tonight, while on the way to yet another Starbucks (yes, I'm scouting staff).

We talked for pretty much the whole car trip (20 minutes), then continued the conversation after I got home. The phone was affixed to my ear when I tucked the kids into bed, and she finally cut it off at 11 p.m. Eastern time. I didn't look, but I'm pretty sure we talked for about 2 1/2 hours tonight.

There's something magical about long-term friendships. J and I have been friends since I was fifteen, and, because of that history, we can talk in shorthand. I know most of her secrets, and she knows mine. When we talk on the phone, the laughter starts way before the punch line. And a lot of steps get skipped in getting to that punch line. I know her parents well enough to get the family issues. I've known her sister since she was a pre-adolescent, and she's known my brother long enough to have been one of his very early crushes. There's a depth to that kind of friendship: she knew me before my husband knew me.

But she's been geographically distant for years now...sufficient years that she has two children I've never seen in person (though I saw the middle child in utero, years ago). She is my daughter's godmother, and she received a shock when she called me back and got Susie on the phone. Apparently Susie has grown up a bit since they last spoke on the phone.

All that to say...I miss my girlfriends. My two best both skipped town a few years ago. While I have lovely people surrounding me, that deep intimacy that I share with J and K has not yet been recreated. I doubt either of them will move back (ever), but it would be great if someone local took their job. Because Sprint is only free after 9 pm and weekends. And Eastern time is an hour later.

Peer pressure

2008-01-26T18:03:00.000-10:00

It's that time of year again...when the cool kids start getting nominated for awards. The big flurry right now is the UU Blog Awards. And, because I can't possibly stay away from such awesomeness, I'll follow suit and pimp some of my favorite Unitarian Universalist entries from the past year.

Five of Five: In which I discuss the pros and cons of subscribing to a religion without a creed.
Sometimes it's sad: Musing about working at a children's cancer hospital
Preaching the word: My first full-length sermon
Mother's Day Sermon: I shared the pulpit with our minister on Mother's Day.
A Unitarian Universalist's Take on St. Joseph's Day: This is one of my favorite posts, ever. And nobody commented. Which tells me that when I get thinky, most people stop reading. (That or they're so intimidated by my brilliance that they're struck "dumb". You be the judge.)
She Forgot Again: Living and working in Memphis means that racial issues are in my face most of the time.
But aren't you scared?: More about race and class and crime and urban renewal
On the Verge: More urban renewal, prompted by a nasty debate on our neighborhood's internet message board
Grace, Interrupted: This one makes me seem like a much better person than I think I really am. But I'll take the credit anyway.

So, if you feel so moved, feel free to nominate me. I don't expect to win (remember? I'm famous for my second-place finishes!), but I'd be happy just to be in the running.

Prolific

2008-01-24T12:01:00.000-10:00

My poor blog is dusty. While I'm walking the dogs (three times a day), I often think about my blog and its dusty state. I ponder writing a new entry and consider topics and what happens inside my brain is something like white noise. Nothing. Nada. Zip.

And, in all honesty (which is, of course, the point of blogging, right?), I really don't have anything now either. Things are, well, fine. Not in that teeth-clenched use of the word. Just fine. Work is going fine (if a bit confusing, since my promotion still hasn't been announced to my new staff...). I've stayed quite busy taking on the administration of this venue, and I'm looking forward to some changes in the next few months.

And at home? The kids are doing fine. (That word again!) School is, well, school, meaning the kids have good grades but all the same annoying things keep being annoying (particularly the weight, likely measured in tonnage, of my pre-adolescent daughter's backpack). I sometimes wonder if we'd be happier with a different school, but I have a feeling that we'd just get a new set of grievances. This week's grievance speaks more of the public served by the public school than the school: just before winter break, a note came home that the school would no longer accept checks for payment for field trips and other incidentals. Craig and I read the memo several times, noting that it specifically did NOT say "afterschool enrichment tuition". Afterschool enrichment tuition is $100 per class, and our boy takes two classes, so we knew we'd be sending a $200 payment in mid-January. We re-read it again, just to make sure, and quite confidently sent in the registration form with a check.

And the check? Came back home that afternoon. With a stressed little boy who thought he wouldn't be able to take the classes since it was the deadline for registration.

Oh hell no! (Spoken in my best Memphis ghetto accent, arms akimbo, with a bit of motion in my neck.) I wasn't about to send $200 in cash with an eight-year-old child, nor was I planning to head over to a gas station to get a money order.

So I called the school. I explained, quite cordially, that there was no way in hell that I was sending $200 cash with a child of eight, and that if they needed me to pay with a money order, I'd be happy to get that to them next Monday, because I have a job and can't just run out and buy money orders whenever I feel like it. (Maybe I was bluffing just a tiny bit...but that doesn't really matter, does it?) The regular secretary gave me the whole, "I totally understand your point, but the deadline is tomorrow," response, then offered to transfer me to the financial secretary, who also totally understood my point and hated that a few deadbeats who wrote bad checks to the school ruined it for all the rest of us fiscally-responsible people.

Then she did exactly what I meant for her to do.

"Mrs. Kid's Mom, go ahead and send the check with your son tomorrow. I'll make an exception this time."

She also gave me her name, which I wrote on the registration form, along with the time and date of our conversation, just in case someone got all crazy and forgot that we had this conversation.

Annnnnnnnnnd, I just spent longer typing this entry than the whole drama took in real life. And it's actually kind of hard to even call it drama. Maybe anecdote is a better word?

Which brings me to this: my blog is dusty. Probably because my life is less-than-scintillating just now. I'll update more when I actually have something to say, okay?

Day One

2008-01-22T15:27:00.000-10:00

It really wasn't like a first day of work. Maybe because I have the same desk, the same phone number, the same co-workers. And when the majority of the day was spent answering old emails, attending departmental meetings, working through a big pile of stuff, and completing my expense report, it really felt more like a last day than a first day.

Oh, and maybe also because my direct reports haven't been told yet about their change in supervisor.

So, no drama. Which is fine. It'll come. But not yet.

Housekeeping

2008-01-20T17:18:00.000-10:00

I realize that I've been quite absent of late, and I apologize. Apparently the deviation from my routine that was my past three weeks had blog-related repercussions. I'll try to do better.

I also realize that, in being a bit circumspect, I've confused a few of you. In the interest of being less confusing, I'll give a bit more information about my professional life than I usually do. (And, in all honesty, I'll likely delete this entry quickly, as I don't want it to haunt me later.)

I work for a children's hospital. It's a very prestigious place to work, and I have no interest or intention of ever leaving, barring retirement. I live ridiculously close to this place (I can see the hospital from all the rooms on the second floor of my house) and love everything about it.

Until December, my job was a little bit more interesting than an administrative assistant. When I was hired, the job was newly-created, and I did a lot with it that had not been imagined. My first boss did not utilize my skills terrifically well, but my second boss immediately saw that I was being horrendously underutilized and spent several months trying to find a new place for me. A place that made more money and had a true impact on our department.

So, in undergoing barista training, I've crossed a hurdle toward my new job. (The new job has been titled, described, and pay-classed already...retroactive to the day I began said training.) BUT...that doesn't mean that my job is barista. In fact, I anticipate that the number of coffees I'll make in a typical week will be closer to five than a hundred.

For those of you keeping score: I have not changed employers, nor departments. My work phone number has not changed. My title, pay grade, and number of direct reports have changed.

The direct reports? That's the most interesting part. And I won't go there on my blog. Because those are people who have their own lives and did not ask, nor consent, to have their careers discussed on the Intarwebs. But yes, I have direct reports, and yes, their lives are fixin' to change.

Because basically? I'm a fixer. We have a broken thing in my department, and I'm going to fix it.

But I also want to tell you about the marvelous people I spent the last two weeks with, in Birmingham. I attended training with them, only because they were kind enough to let me crash their party. They were 100% welcoming, 100% kind, and 100% hard to leave. I may have even slipped one or two or five of them a business card and told them to call me if they ever wanted to move to Memphis.

And then, when it was time for me to drive home? They gave me presents and a card and one of them even gave me a company-specific recognition thing that really, really melted my heart.

Those ladies, folks, are fantastic. The store they're opening will be awesome. I wish I could be there for their grand opening tomorrow, because YES, it will be GRAND.

So, yes, new job. No, new employer. Yes, more money and responsibility. Yes, direct reports.

And, yes, a little nervous about Tuesday. And more than a little happy that tomorrow is a holiday.

Certified

2008-01-14T13:58:00.000-10:00

Over the past couple of years, I've gotten some career-related certifications. Certifications so unrelated to my college major that my freshly-out-of-college self would have had a big laugh to even consider them to be part of my life.

I got another one today. And got an almost-perfect score on the exam.

And what I can tell you is this: I smell, at this moment, like a combination of espresso, hazelnut syrup, and whipped cream. It's not a bad smell. But I may not sleep for the rest of the month.

I'm pretty sure my parents didn't have this in mind when they sent me to college, but I'll tell you: I'm really excited about my new job.

Unproductive time

2008-01-10T16:16:00.000-10:00

I had such lofty goals for my time in Birmingham. I was going to work on my NaNoWriMo book. I was going to work out every day. I was going to venture out to exciting restaurants.

Bet you're dying to know what I've accomplished. Yes?

I've become completely addicted to C.S.I. Specifically, the Las Vegas version.

It began innocently enough. My lovely family dropped me off at the Birmingham airport, and I drove away in my rental car, hotel-bound. We'd just spent the better part of a week together, half the time driving to and from Orlando, Florida. We'd ridden roller coasters and other thrill rides. We'd spent quality time with my parents. We'd braved a rare cold front in the usually-balmy Sunshine State.

I was, sad to say, a little tired upon my arrival to the hotel.

And I switched on the television. I don't know exactly what happened, but I watched most of a pretty lame movie starring J. Lo, then ordered some lovely Chinese food (the only nearby restaurant listed on Delivery.com), and somehow the television found itself on an episode of C.S.I.

Then another.

And another.

Turns out Spike runs FIVE episodes of C.S.I., back to back, on Sundays.

The rest of the week's evenings have been spent in fervent searches for more episodes. I'm telling you, it's like crack.

As a result, I've not ventured far from my hotel room, other than attending the training I'm here for. I've eaten nothing wonderful. All dinners except one have been consumed in my room, in the chair I'm currently occupying, with the television just four feet away.

I found an episode at 7 this evening, but haven't found one at 8, so I'm drooling while watching Jamie Oliver on Iron Chef America. I'm pretty sure E.R. is new at 9, but I know I'll get two more C.S.I. episodes at 10 and 11.

And I'm eating from the same Chinese place. There was a tornado warning this afternoon, and it's still windy and rainy and I didn't feel like going anywhere.

BUT! I did work out as soon as I got back from "work." So that's something, right?

And I've got dinner plans with my "co-workers" next week. On two days!

But I'll be getting "home" early, because I'm a junkie.

(Is it totally horrible that I'm looking forward to getting back here on Sunday night?)

Tough call

2008-01-07T14:19:00.000-10:00

I'm having trouble picking a favorite Democrat for the upcoming primary election. I leaned toward Edwards, then Obama, then Clinton, and back and forth. But this makes me lean closer to Hillary again.

More posting later. I'm tired right now.

Not quite done with 2007

2008-01-03T17:29:00.000-10:00

The year's not officially over, it seems, until a blogger completes this meme. I'm the last to jump in, so I won't bother linking to everyone who's already done it. Because it's pretty much everyone.

1. Where did you begin 2007?
At the house. I didn't pace myself (thank you, Jagermeister) and was in bed by 12:30. And maybe a glass got broken.

2. Did you have to go to the hospital?
Um, yeah. Because I work there.

3. Did you have any encounters with the police?
None that I can recall.

4. Where did you go on vacation?
There was a trip to West Virginia to see my cousin get married and give my parents their annual temporary custody of the kids. Then the return of the kids, along with BlogHer 2007, in Chicago. And a long weekend in Branson. Then another long weekend in Chicago, for my brother's wedding.

5. What did you purchase that was over $500?
A new washer. Does a new a/c system for the car count? Because it was way over $500.

6. Did you know anybody who got married?
Yes, my brother (and his wife) and my cousin (and her husband). And I gave some impressive coaching to a co-worker who proposed to his girlfriend on Christmas Eve.

7. What sporting events did you attend?
I don't recall any. We somehow missed the entire minor league baseball season.

8. What concerts/shows did you go to?
The Memphis Vocal Arts Ensemble's holiday concert, and I sang in their two spring concerts.

9. Where do you live now?
Downtown Memphis, Tennessee.

10. Describe your birthday:
Shared with Mothers' Day, preached a sermon in church, sang an opera concert. It was a busy day.

11. What’s the one thing you thought you would never do, but did in 2007?
Joined a gym.

12. What’s something you learned about yourself?
I like working out.

13. Any new additions to your family?
My sister-in-law and our kitten.

14. What was your best month?
That's a toss-up between July (kids out of town) and December (promotion at work).

15. What music will you remember 2007 by?
Probably the music my kids practiced, on guitar, piano, and cello. And that damn "Umbrella" song, the tune my son's hip-hop group performed their number to. Oh, and Soulja Boy.

16. Made new friends?
Yep, at BlogHer. You know who you are.

17. Favorite night out?
Huh. Not sure there is one. My kids and husband and I almost always have a great time when we go out together.

18. Any regrets?
We always have trouble budgeting our money between semesters. I wish we'd done that better.

19. What do you want to change in 2008?
I've already made some budgetary changes; I need to work on that some more.

20. Do you have a New Year’s resolution?
Not really. I've made a few attainable goals. But really, just staying as awesome as possible is the plan.

21. Be honest - did you watch American Idol?
Hells yeah!

22. Will you be happy to see 2007 go?
It was a rough year for lots of people, but it was fine by me. I think 2008's gonna be even better, though.

23. How did you end 2007?
At home, again, with suitcases packed for a trip to Florida, to be followed by a two-week business trip for me to train for my new job. My age must be catching up with me, though, because I took a nap so I could make it to midnight. And, in a staggeringly uncharacteristic move, I did not finish my glass of champagne, nor did I finish my daily glass of red wine. (And I haven't had any in 2008 yet.)

Growing

2008-01-02T18:40:00.001-10:00

My children are, by all signs, in the midst of a growth spurt. Normally, they take turns with the growing. My son will almost catch up to his sister's still-superior height, then she'll shoot up, physically proving that she is the big sister and he's the little brother.

We, the parents, are given a bit of warning when the growth spurts are beginning. The child, who normally has a, well, normal appetite, suddenly is starving. Like, tapeworm starving. And sleeps more than normal. A week or two later, pants are outgrown (which, for girls, is okay...long pants can turn into capris until they get tight).

The boy is taller than he was the last time he saw his grandparents, about six weeks ago. And the girl won't. stop. eating. The boy, usually an early riser, has been the last to awaken for the past few days. The girl, who is currently sleeping about a meter from me, looks much more like "woman" than "baby", even in sleep. Which, I suppose, is fitting, since she's chronologically closer to womanhood than infancy.

It's a roller coaster so much more amazing than any we'll ride tomorrow.

Last post of 2007

2007-12-31T06:18:00.001-10:00

I'll probably be posting sporadically over the next few weeks, what with business travel (and fun vacation) being the story of my life until Martin Luther King, Jr. weekend. I'm excited about this new chapter in my professional life. I'm also excited about my per diem and my corporate card and having a hotel room all to myself.

Bets on how quickly the novelty wears off? I'm thinking around Thursday.

I'm entertaining the notion of becoming a bizarre food blogger while I'm on the road. Photographing my restaurant meals and writing about them. Because seriously? Without my kids and husband and neighborhood for material, I'll be scraping the bottom of the barrel.

But I'll tell you one thing...this training? Will result in me being very jacked up on caffeine. I can assure you of that.